Being a coach, I thought this was funny....

[kaorder1999]

COACHES OFFICE ANSWERING MACHINE!

The outgoing message:

"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of the football Program. In order to assist you in connecting to the right coach, please listen to all the options before making a selection:

* To lie about why your child is missed practice - Press 1

* To make excuses for why your child shouldn’t have to follow team rules- Press 2

* To complain about what we do without actually talking with someone in person - Press 3

* To swear at coaches - Press 4

* To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you and discussed at Booster meetings - Press 5

* If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -Press 6

* To request another coach, for the third time this year -Press 7

* To complain the coaches are too hard on the kids - Press 8

* To complain the coaches aren’t hard enough on the kids - Press 9

* To complain about coaches being inaccessible – just speak up, call us at work or at home, come up after a game, send an email, send a postcard, a text message or even come by our office.

* If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, performance, attitude and that it's not the coaches’ fault for your child's lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!

[pirate4state]

As a friend to many coaches, I think this is funny

[Hannibal]

I think that should be on EVERY field house answering machine!!

[Adidas410s]

I'm surprised there wasn't an option for a parent to complain about their kid not getting enough playing time.

[burnet44]

press 1 for your complaint to be recorded
we are not going to listen to it anyway
but we hope it makes you feel better

thank you and have a good day

[olddawggreen]

* To attempt to suck up the the coach of your choice, press 11

* To explain to a coach why your son should be a starter on the team because you coached him all the way through Pewee Football, Little League Baseball and Little Dribblers and he has always had a starting position, press 00

[Bearkat]

The sad thing is most coaches need this type of answering machine. Wouldn't it be nice to "coach" instead of dealing with this type of stuff.

[CHS_CG]

Originally posted by Adidas410s
I'm surprised there wasn't an option for a parent to complain about their kid not getting enough playing time.

thats the number 1 problem here..

[kaorder1999]

there and everywhere!