Romantic Guidelines for the men :)

[44INAROW]

In the world of romance, one single rule applies:
Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you
get points. Do
something she dislikes and points are subtracted.

You don't get any points for doing something she
expects. Sorry, that's
the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow(0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) In the rain

(+8) But return with Beer (-5)
You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
You check out a suspicious noise, and it is
nothing(0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something
(+5)
You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
It's her cat (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat
with a college
buddy(-2)
Named Tina (-4)
Tina is a dancer (-6)
Tina has silicon implants, low cut blouse, erect
nipples (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY
You take her out to dinner (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar
(+1)
Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night(-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and
your face is painted the colors of your favorite team
(-10)

HIS BIRTHDAY
You ask for anything that rhymes with the word snow
job (-9,000)

A NIGHT OUT
You take her to a movie (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans
(-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE
You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get
rid of it(+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy
jeans and baggy
Hawaiian shirts (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too."
(-8,000)

ENJOY THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you lose points
no matter what]
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)
Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION
When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen,
displaying what
looks like a concerned expression (0)
You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at
the TV (+500)
You don't scratch your privates (+500)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep
(-10,000)

[bullfrog_alumni_02]

Originally posted by 44INAROW
ENJOY THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you lose points
no matter what]

if you think your not going to like the answer we give, then dont ask. its as simple as that. i dont see what the point of making me loose "romance point" because you (insert your significant other here) want to know if something make you look fat. we are w/ you because we care about you, and for what is on the inside. stop worrying about it so much and come one already!!!

[Bandera YaYa]

I think you have waaaaaaaaay to much free time.......AND I for one, would love to go to a sports bar for my birthday!! And I strongly disagree with the penalty for talking to "Ms. Booby"...I would be more inclined to administer the "Bobbitt" penalty in that situation!!!

[AP Panther Fan]

Originally posted by Bandera YaYa
I think you have waaaaaaaaay to much free time.......AND I for one, would love to go to a sports bar for my birthday!! And I strongly disagree with the penalty for talking to "Ms. Booby"...I would be more inclined to administer the "Bobbitt" penalty in that situation!!!

LOL...didn't someone post the joke about Lorena Bobbits sister the other day?

[44INAROW]

Originally posted by bullfrog_alumni_02
if you think your not going to like the answer we give, then dont ask. its as simple as that. i dont see what the point of making me loose "romance point" because you (insert your significant other here) want to know if something make you look fat. we are w/ you because we care about you, and for what is on the inside. stop worrying about it so much and come one already!!!

[BrahmaMom]

I will be forwarding this valuable information to sons #1 & 2, and holding it for #3 & 4 till they are ready. I may make a copy for BrahmaDad, he might appreciate the extra points!!

[Leopards,class of 75]

These are all so true 44! Really good ones, thanks again for a good post!