Your Momma.....

[PPHSfan]

...is so Fat, I took her to a restaurant last night, and the waiter asked me if I wanted to see a menu. I said no, I think I need an estimate. :p

Just trying to take a little of the heat off of Buckeye80 :rolleyes:

[Buckeye80]

Yo momma is so fat, the back of her neck looks like a package of hot dogs.

[jason]

Yo mama's so ugly, even Bill Clinton wouldn't sleep with her.

[jason]

Yo mama's so ugly, if she were a scarecrow, the corn would run away.

[Buckeye80]

jason:
Yo mama's so ugly, even Bill Clinton wouldn't sleep with her.Now that's ugly, because I heard "slick Willy" was into she-males.

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that she was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the New World! :D

[Ranger Mom]

..is so fat that when she hauls A$$ she has to make 2 trips!!

<small>[ November 12, 2003, 08:47 AM: Message edited by: Ranger Mom ]</small>

[PPHSfan]

eek!

[Tarpon2004]

Yo mama is so Fat her belt size is EQUATOR

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on the scale it reads.....to be continued! eek! :D

[CatWoman]

... when she steps on the scales, it says To be Continued!

[JasperDog94]

...is so fat, when she steps on a scale, it says "one at a time please" :D

[JasperDog94]

Yo mama has so much hair under her arm, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock. :D :D :D

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat she has more Chins than a Chinese phone book! :D

[Ranger Mom]

is so fat when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease the doctor gave her 13 years to live.

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that you have to grease the bathtub to get her out! :D

[Ranger Mom]

..is so fat when I yell "Hey, Kool-Aid!" she comes crashing through the wall.

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts! :D

[PPHSfan]

......is so fat, When she goes line dancing...the Band Skips.

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that her waist size is bigger than her IQ! :D

[JasperDog94]

Yo mama is so fat, when she goes swimming, she leaves "ring around the lake". eek!

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that she went on a date wearing high heels and came back with sandals! :D

[JasperDog94]

Yo mama is so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund...(sorry, I just had to get that football reference to legitimize this topic)

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so ugly, she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning! :D

[PPHSfan]

......is so Silly, she finds PPHSfan Charming.

[BulldogGrl64]

PPHSfan:
......is so Silly, she finds PPHSfan Charming.LOL Good one to throw in there! :D

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so hairy, they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower! :D

[cunbed10]

Yo Moma farts stinks so bad, that she has a chain hanging from them.

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama's lips are so big that Chap Stick had to invent a spray! :D

[PPHSfan]

....is so fat, she gets her toenails painted at Maco. :D

<small>[ November 12, 2003, 10:09 AM: Message edited by: PPHSfan ]</small>

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, traffic slows down when she smiles! :D

[Old No. 7]

LOL. Thanks, I needed that this morning. :D :D

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so stupid that she tried to put her M&M's in alphabetical order! :D

[PPHSfan]

BulldogGrl64:
Yo mama is so stupid that she tried to put her M&M's in alphabetical order! :D That is not so hard.

MMMMMMMMMMMWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[BulldogGrl64]

PPHSfan:

BulldogGrl64:
Yo mama is so stupid that she tried to put her M&M's in alphabetical order! :D That is not so hard.

MMMMMMMMMMMWWWWWWWWWWWWWLMAO!! :D

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so stupid, she took a spoon to the Superbowl! :D

[Ranger Mom]

is so fat her cereal bowl comes equipped with a lifeguard!!

<small>[ November 12, 2003, 10:53 AM: Message edited by: Ranger Mom ]</small>

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that when she heard someone say it's chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl and "said lets eat!" :D

[fhseagle]

yo mama is so fat, she sat on a rainbow, and skittle came out.

[TarponFanInNorthTexas]

.....is so fat, she broke her leg and gravy poured out.

[PPHSfan]

TarponFanInNorthTexas:
.....is so fat, she broke her leg and gravy poured out.EEWWWW

[JasperDog94]

Yo mama is so stupid, she got hit by a parked car. :p

[TarponFanInNorthTexas]

.....is so fat, they determine high and low tides whenever your mama is in the water or not.

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat that when she wears a yellow rain coat children mistake her for the school bus! :D

[TarponFanInNorthTexas]

.....is so fat, Garth Brooks got the inspiration for his song "The Thunder Rolls" when he saw your mama rolling down a hill.

[PPHSfan]

....is so SMART, she picked Gilmer to beat Daingerfield this Friday.

[JasperDog94]

TarponFanInNorthTexas:
.....is so fat, Garth Brooks got the inspiration for his song "The Thunder Rolls" when he saw your mama rolling down a hill.Man,I can't stand that song... :confused: :mad: frown

[BulldogGrl64]

Yo mama is so fat, she looks like she is smuggling a Volkswagon in her pants! :D

[cunbed10]

Yo Moma is so ugly; she made an onion cry!

[AggieJohn]

so fat that when she jumps the makes the record skip.............at the radio station

[crzyjournalist03]

your momma's so fat that when she fell off of a cliff at the grand canyon, she got stuck.

[spiveyrat]

Here's one for the Jasper fans in Washington...

Yo mama's so fat...
... to get a "spray on tan", she has to use one of Boeing's paint hangars.

[crzyjournalist03]

your momma's so ugly that every time she has a kid, the doctor slaps her.

[JasperDog94]

Yo mama is so ugly, she couldn't even get kissed at Kyle Field when A&M scored. :p :p :p

[crzyjournalist03]

JasperDog94:
Yo mama is so ugly, she couldn't even get kissed at Kyle Field when A&M scored. :p :p :p well, that's not saying much considering how many times A&M is scoring this year...

[CatWoman]

is so fat, she stepped on a dollar bill and made change.

[crzyjournalist03]

is so stupid that she can't remember the recipe for ice water.

[crzyjournalist03]

is so stupid, she can't remember the phone number for 911.

[44INAROW]

Ranger Mom:
..is so fat that when she hauls A$$ she has to make 2 trips!!ROFL RangerMom.. that is one I've never heard

[3afan2K3]

is so stupid she called me for my phone number

[crzyjournalist03]

3afan2K3:
is so stupid she called me for my phone numberyeah...that would be stupid...who would want your phone number? wink :p :D

[bigdogsbulldogmom]

is so fat she uses a boomerang to put her belt on

[3afan2K3]

crzyjournalist03:

3afan2K3:
is so stupid she called me for my phone numberyeah...that would be stupid...who would want your phone number? wink :p :D are you still mad I made the 100,000 post

[crzyjournalist03]

tsk, tsk, tsk, one of these days you'll find better excuses... :p

[bigdogsbulldogmom]

was so ugly ,when she was born , they had to put her in an incubator with a tinted window

[TarponFanInNorthTexas]

Your mama is so stupid, she asked me what the letter after "X" was, I said "Y", she said "I just wanna know"

[CHS_DT#75]

is so fat she jumped up in the air and said, "Hey get me down."

[CHS_DT#75]

is so fat she bought a water bed an started puttin a blanket over teh pacific ocean...

[bigdogsbulldogmom]

every time she wears her Malcom X shirt the helicopters try to land on her

[PPHSfan]

....smells so bad, the flies pitched in and bought yall a screen door.

[LogieJoeBean001]

Thanks for making my son and I laugh our BUTTS off! He has asked me to print these out. Do I have everyones permission? He has some good ones too, but is doing his homework right now. Sooooooo....

To be continued........

[jvplayer2006]

......is so dumb, she got hit by a parked car. :p

[sinton66]

Yo mama is so ugly, she has to wear a pork chop around her neck so the dog will play with her.

[3afan2K3]

its "yo mamma" not "your mamma"

[Ranger Mom]

LogieJoeBean001:
Thanks for making my son and I laugh our BUTTS off! He has asked me to print these out. Do I have everyones permission? He has some good ones too, but is doing his homework right now. Sooooooo....

To be continued........I don't see why anyone would have a problem with that...besides it's a public forum so print away!! :D

[crzyjournalist03]

Ranger Mom:

LogieJoeBean001:
Thanks for making my son and I laugh our BUTTS off! He has asked me to print these out. Do I have everyones permission? He has some good ones too, but is doing his homework right now. Sooooooo....

To be continued........I don't see why anyone would have a problem with that...besides it's a public forum so print away!! :D actually, I was considering copyrighting all of my "momma jokes" and selling a book... :D :rolleyes:

[Buckeye80]

This is something my cousin used to say to me to "cut me down" when we were little....ahem

Yo momma, yo daddy, yo greasy granny's
Got holes in her panties and the bees are behind
She loves Frankenstein
She goes, "Beep beep beep" down Sesame Street.

I'm still not sure about the insult part since we have the same grandmother, but it used to make me mad when he said it.

[Ranger Mom]

LOL!!!! I remember that!!!

Just a few words were different for me!

Yo Mamma, Yo Daddy, Yo greasy grannys got a hole in her panties, got a big behind like a Frankenstein!

[TarponFanInNorthTexas]

Yo mama is like a bowling ball. You pick her up, throw her into the gutter, and she comes back for more!

Edited it.....better?

<small>[ November 13, 2003, 12:05 AM: Message edited by: TarponFanInNorthTexas ]</small>

[Ranger Mom]

TarponFanInNorthTexas:
Yo mama is like a bowling ball. You pick her up, finger her, throw her into the gutter, and she comes back for more!eek! eek! eek! eek! eek!

[crzyjournalist03]

wow...be careful TFINT

[aamove]

Your mama is so ugly she looks like she was sackin' Bobcats and ran out of sacks.

[aamove]

your mama is so ugly she could scare a maggot off a gut wagon.

[Chris Hart]

Yo mama is so ugly, it looks like her face caught on fire and someone put it out with a roofing hatchet. :D

[Ranger Mom]

...is so fat instead of Levi's 501 jeans she wears Levi's 1002s.

[aamove]

Your mama is so fat she has an echo in her belly button.

[aamove]

your sister is so ugly I thought she was your mama.

[Ranger Mom]

...so short you can see her feet on her driver's license!

[TarponFanInNorthTexas]

crzyjournalist03:
wow...be careful TFINTI knew i'd hear it for that one.....darn, MY BAD.

<small>[ November 13, 2003, 12:04 AM: Message edited by: TarponFanInNorthTexas ]</small>

[Rabdad]

Yo' mama's so fat, when she dies, her paulbearers will be driving fork lifts.

[jason]

Ranger Mom:

TarponFanInNorthTexas:
Yo mama is like a bowling ball. You pick her up, finger her, throw her into the gutter, and she comes back for more!eek! eek! eek! eek! eek! ROLFMAO

[jason]

Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it.

[jason]

Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!

[cunbed10]

Yo Momma wears a wig with a chin-strap.

[cunbed10]

Yo Momma is blind, but she always says "I see what you mean".

[cunbed10]

Yo Momma's teeth has so many gaps, one tooth has a sign that reads,"next tooth 5 miles.

[cunbed10]

Yo Momma's teeth has so many gaps, it looks like her tongue is in jail.

[Tarpon2004]

U-G-L-Y you aint got no ALABI you UGLY yea yea you UGLY............. M-A-M-A how you think you got that way yo MAMA yea yea yo MAMA......

[JasperDog94]

Tarpon2004:
U-G-L-Y you aint got no ALABI you UGLY yea yea you UGLY............. M-A-M-A how you think you got that way yo MAMA yea yea yo MAMA......ROTFLOL! :D :D :D

Reminds me of the Spartan cheerleaders.

[QBKilla]

Yo momma is so fat when she walks backwards she beeps.

40

[QBKilla]

Yo momma is so fat, she walked out on the road and I ran out of gas trying to swerve around her.

40

[jason]

Tarpon2004:
U-G-L-Y you aint got no ALABI you UGLY yea yea you UGLY............. M-A-M-A how you think you got that way yo MAMA yea yea yo MAMA......ROTFLMAO