If you want a good laugh

[44INAROW]

go check out some of the threads with 8 or more posts on them - alot of the time, the last posts have nothing to do with the subject of the threads lol........ I am as guilty as the next person but I really laughed at the "Italian Job" thread.. it starts off being about Mini Coopers and ends up being about ziploc bags :D

[crzyjournalist03]

You know what would make a good story?
Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.


--Jack Handey

[Darren]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
You know what would make a good story?
Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.


--Jack Handey

Where are you getting these from...LOL

I have to read more of them.

[44INAROW]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
You know what would make a good story?
Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.


--Jack Handey

Deep Thoughts.............:p

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
You know what would make a good story?
Something about a clown who makes people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.


--Jack Handey

I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free.
To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's
throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.

-Jack Handey

[pirate4state]

Originally posted by BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END
I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free.
To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's
throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.

-Jack Handey

HAHAHAHAHAHA

[pirate4state]

Originally posted by 44INAROW
go check out some of the threads with 8 or more posts on them - alot of the time, the last posts have nothing to do with the subject of the threads lol........ I am as guilty as the next person but I really laughed at the "Italian Job" thread.. it starts off being about Mini Coopers and ends up being about ziploc bags :D

for some reason i thought this was gonna about a PM

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

I think somebody should come up with a way to breed a very large shrimp. That way, you could ride him, then, after you camped at night, you could eat him. How about it, science?

-Jack Handey

[AP Panther Fan]

Originally posted by BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END
I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free.
To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's
throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.

-Jack Handey

:evillol: :evillol: :evillol: :evillol:

more please.....:D

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
:evillol: :evillol: :evillol: :evillol:

more please.....:D

If you go to a party, and you want to be the popular one at the party, do this: Wait until no one is looking, then kick a burning log out of the fireplace onto the carpet. Then jump on top of it with your body and yell, "Log o' fire! Log o' fire!" I've never done this, but I think it'd work.

-Jack Handey

[Darren]

Originally posted by BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END
If you go to a party, and you want to be the popular one at the party, do this: Wait until no one is looking, then kick a burning log out of the fireplace onto the carpet. Then jump on top of it with your body and yell, "Log o' fire! Log o' fire!" I've never done this, but I think it'd work.

-Jack Handey


LOL>>>>LOL>>>>>>LOL


I've never done this but I think it would work.:D :D :D

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

If I had a nickname, I think I would want it to be "Prince of Weasels",
because then I could go up and bite people and they would turn around and go,
"What the-?" And then they would recognize me, and go, "Oh, it's you, the
Prince of Weasels

-Jack Handey

[Darren]

I finally found a website with some of his quotes.

He is just so off the wall he is funny. Reminds me of Naked Gun or Airplane humor.

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

http://farstrider.net/DeepThoughts/Handey.htm

[AP Panther Fan]

Originally posted by Darren
LOL>>>>LOL>>>>>>LOL


I've never done this but I think it would work.:D :D :D


My husband (the one that thinks he is a boyscout) has precariously stacked logs in our fireplace to the point one fell out on the floor :mad:

He wasn't very popular with me afterwords....thank goodness my floor is tile. I don't think I have ever moved that fast though...picking up a flaming log and getting it back in the fireplace isn't as easy as it might sound.:D

[44INAROW]

Originally posted by Darren
I finally found a website with some of his quotes.

He is just so off the wall he is funny. Reminds me of Naked Gun or Airplane humor.

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

http://farstrider.net/DeepThoughts/Handey.htm

"Surely, you gest"

"Don't call me Shirley"

:D :D :D :D

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

I think the board should recognize me as the first person to ever post a Deep Thought on here. :D

[44INAROW]

Elaine Dickinson: Would you like something to read?
Hanging Lady: Do you have anything light?
Elaine Dickinson: How about this leaflet, "Famous Jewish Sports Legends?"

Ok, I am going to get some work done, you'll behave and I'll be back in an hour or too............

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

Sometimes I wish Marta were more loyal to me. Like the other day. The car
parked next to ours had a real dirty windshield; so I wrote THIS CAR LOOKS
LIKE A FART in the dirt. Later I asked Marta if she thought it was a childish
thing to do. She said, "Well, maybe," Man, whose side is she on, anyway?


-Jack Handey

[Darren]

You ever been in a cockpit before?

[Darren]

If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind people and pinching them is probably a joke that gets old real fast.

Jack--

[AP Panther Fan]

Originally posted by BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END
Sometimes I wish Marta were more loyal to me. Like the other day. The car
parked next to ours had a real dirty windshield; so I wrote THIS CAR LOOKS
LIKE A FART in the dirt. Later I asked Marta if she thought it was a childish
thing to do. She said, "Well, maybe," Man, whose side is she on, anyway?


-Jack Handey


ROFL......the people in my office are starting to think I am on drugs.:evillol: :evillol: :evillol:

[crzyjournalist03]

Originally posted by BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END
I think the board should recognize me as the first person to ever post a Deep Thought on here. :D

when was that???

[crzyjournalist03]

"To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad."

-Jack Handey

[Darren]

Probably the saddest thing you'll ever see is a mosquito sucking on a mummy. Forget it, little friend.

Jack Handey


Man this guy is nuts......But He is SO FUNNY..

[pirate4state]

Originally posted by 44INAROW
"Surely, you gest"

"Don't call me Shirley"

:D :D :D :D

:D :D :D :D

"This women has got to be taken to a hospital"

"What is it Doctor?"

"It's a big building with windows, but that's not important right now."

[Darren]

Jack Handey sure will brighten your day...:D :D :D

[Darren]

Originally posted by Darren
You ever been in a cockpit before?

Anyone with the next line????

[pirate4state]

Originally posted by Darren
Anyone with the next line????

Is it

"Have you ever seen a grown man naked?"

[AP Panther Fan]

Originally posted by pirate4state
Is it

"Have you ever seen a grown man naked?"


YOU are good....(I think)

Captain Oveur: "Ya ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before!
Captain Oveur: "Ya ever seen a grown man naked?

— from the 1980 movie 'Airplane.'

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
when was that???

9/7/06

I wish a robot would get elected president. That way, when he came to town, we could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad.

-Jack Handey


Posted by me. :D

[crzyjournalist03]

Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
YOU are good....(I think)

Captain Oveur: "Ya ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before!
Captain Oveur: "Ya ever seen a grown man naked?

— from the 1980 movie 'Airplane.'

Little Girl: "I like my coffee just like I like my men--strong and black!"

[JasperDog94]

Originally posted by BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END
I think the board should recognize me as the first person to ever post a Deep Thought on here. :D I think someone already beat you to it.

link (http://bbs.3adownlow.com/vb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16780&highlight=jack+handy)

[Darren]

Originally posted by pirate4state
Is it

"Have you ever seen a grown man naked?"

Yep.....

Thats my favorite line from that Movie. (I'm not sure why its funny but it is)

[crzyjournalist03]

Originally posted by Darren
Yep.....

Thats my favorite line from that Movie. (I'm not sure why its funny but it is)

if you ask a kid that question these days, you're going straight to jail!

[Darren]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
if you ask a kid that question these days, you're going straight to jail!

I know.... Thats why I said i'm not sure why it's funny.

I don't think that it was the content on the statement as much as it is that it was so random.

I mean he starts off with a typical question like have you ever been a cockpit before and then jumps onto a completely different topic.

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by Darren


I mean he starts off with a typical question like have you ever been a cockpit before and then jumps onto a completely different topic.

Hey.....that sounds like what we do around here!!:D :D

[44INAROW]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
Hey.....that sounds like what we do around here!!:D :D

ironically, that is what this thread was about.. :D :D :D :D

[pirate4state]

Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
YOU are good....(I think)

Captain Oveur: "Ya ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before!
Captain Oveur: "Ya ever seen a grown man naked?

— from the 1980 movie 'Airplane.'

:D

Airplane RULES!!!

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by 44INAROW
ironically, that is what this thread was about.. :D :D :D :D

WHAT?? I inadvertently hi-jacked a thread back to where it started???

Will wonders never cease!!:p :p

[44INAROW]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
WHAT?? I inadvertently hi-jacked a thread back to where it started???

Will wonders never cease!!:p :p

full circle girlfriend, full circle :clap: :clap: :clap:

[BIG BLUE DEFENSIVE END]

Originally posted by JasperDog94
I think someone already beat you to it.

link (http://bbs.3adownlow.com/vb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16780&highlight=jack+handy)

It's Jack Handey, so I typed that into the search and that didn't come out. Sorry for the mix up everyone.