Adidas410s
05-02-2007, 02:28 PM
The wacky neighbor is a sitcom staple. Neighbors like Kramer from Seinfeld, Lenny & Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley, and Carl Brutanunanadilewski from Aqua Teen Hunger Force make for great entertainment. They're always part of some wild adventure or providing comic relief. But, let's face it: these people would make terrible neighbors in real life.
The real neighbors you want are ones who are courteous, quiet, and friendly. Or hot. Here are the seven television neighbors you'd want in real life:
Ned Flanders (The Simpsons): Yes, Ned is religious. And even if that isn't your cup of tea, it's okay, because Ned doesn't shove the bible down your throat. He is a quiet, respectful neighbor who always keeps up on his yard work. His house never looks dilapidated, and you know there aren't going to be any late-night parties at ol' Ned's house. Yes sir, he's as quiet as a mouse. And so are his little boys. Plus, you can borrow stuff and never give it back because Ned's too much of a weenie to demand anything from anybody! Ned Flanders, a neighbor worth taking advantage of.
Monica & Rachel (Friends): To really benefit from having Monica and Rachel as neighbors, you obviously have to make friends with them. And then you get to enjoy all the perks. For instance, the gang's always having breakfast at Monica's. She's a cook, for crying out loud, and she loves to cook for everyone. Just get on her good side and she'll feed you. She may also help you clean or even clean for you if you somehow let her know that you are inept at, say, cleaning a kitchen. It'll eat away at her brain to know that the kitchen next door isn't clean and she'll probably bring fresh-baked cookies and scouring pads over!
Rachel is also a beneficial neighbor, as long as you get along and you wear the same size. The girl works at Ralph Lauren and can get you some pretty sweet discounts. Plus, she loves to loan out her clothes because she doesn't seem to wear anything more than once. Just work out (maybe cut back on Monica's cookies) and get down to Rachel's size and you're set. And there are also the hot guys who get dumped by Rachel whenever she realizes, once again, that she loves Ross. Just listen closely and then open your door for hotties like Paolo and Joshua when Rachel runs them off.
Fred & Ethel Mertz (I Love Lucy): The best neighbors ever were probably Fred and Ethel Mertz from I Love Lucy. Fred was a bit of an old-fashioned fellow and was good for a laugh, but he never seriously came in between Lucy and Ethel's fun. And, what's better than a neighbor who is also your best friend? Lucy and Ethel hung out together all the time--they even got jobs together! And, when Lucy and Ricky decided to move out to the country, the best neighbors in the world followed them out there. That's priceless because you really can't choose your neighbors.
The Rubbles (The Flintstones): The Rubbles make even better neighbors than the Mertzes because they were both friends with Fred and Wilma Flintstone. Barney and Fred worked together and Barney was always just dopey enough to go along with any of Fred's hair-brained schemes. Barney was also a great fall guy because Fred could screw up royally and always find a way to blame it on Barney. Did Barney care or protest? Not really. Betty made a great pal for Wilma because they had kids the same age and obviously shopped at the same clothing stores and had the same hairdresser. The Rubbles always went along on Flintstone family vacations and were basically a good support mechanism for the dysfunctional marriage of the Flintstones.
The Fonz (Happy Days): If you can live with the noise from his motorcycle, Fonzie is really a great neighbor to have. Let's say you're kinda nerdy like Richie Cunningham. No problem! The Fonz is a cool dude--and he's actually a nice guy, too--and just being around him... hell, just knowing him automatically ups your cool quotient. He can teach you how to get hot chicks and how to just be cool, man. If you're a cutie like Joanie Cunningham, The Fonz is a great neighbor because you get to stare at eye candy all day. Plus, he has a sort-of protective side about him so you know he's going to come to your rescue if there's ever any trouble with another fella.
Wilson (Home Improvement): Forget therapy! Just walk outside and talk to your back fence. No matter what has you down--your wife, husband, kids or parents--Wilson can help you find a solution that works for everybody. Sure, his wisdom is a little far-out... and the fact that you never see his face might make you crazy with curiosity about whether he's been burned by boiling oil... but he always makes sense in the end. Plus, he's always right.
Winnie Cooper (The Wonder Years): I'm taking the male perspective on this one. Winnie Cooper is the prettiest girl in school and you live next door to her! She knows you, dude! Even though you're a tad bit nerdy and slow to go through puberty, Winnie still looks to you for companionship and advice when the world of a teen-ager just gets to be too hard. Plus, she's hot.
The real neighbors you want are ones who are courteous, quiet, and friendly. Or hot. Here are the seven television neighbors you'd want in real life:
Ned Flanders (The Simpsons): Yes, Ned is religious. And even if that isn't your cup of tea, it's okay, because Ned doesn't shove the bible down your throat. He is a quiet, respectful neighbor who always keeps up on his yard work. His house never looks dilapidated, and you know there aren't going to be any late-night parties at ol' Ned's house. Yes sir, he's as quiet as a mouse. And so are his little boys. Plus, you can borrow stuff and never give it back because Ned's too much of a weenie to demand anything from anybody! Ned Flanders, a neighbor worth taking advantage of.
Monica & Rachel (Friends): To really benefit from having Monica and Rachel as neighbors, you obviously have to make friends with them. And then you get to enjoy all the perks. For instance, the gang's always having breakfast at Monica's. She's a cook, for crying out loud, and she loves to cook for everyone. Just get on her good side and she'll feed you. She may also help you clean or even clean for you if you somehow let her know that you are inept at, say, cleaning a kitchen. It'll eat away at her brain to know that the kitchen next door isn't clean and she'll probably bring fresh-baked cookies and scouring pads over!
Rachel is also a beneficial neighbor, as long as you get along and you wear the same size. The girl works at Ralph Lauren and can get you some pretty sweet discounts. Plus, she loves to loan out her clothes because she doesn't seem to wear anything more than once. Just work out (maybe cut back on Monica's cookies) and get down to Rachel's size and you're set. And there are also the hot guys who get dumped by Rachel whenever she realizes, once again, that she loves Ross. Just listen closely and then open your door for hotties like Paolo and Joshua when Rachel runs them off.
Fred & Ethel Mertz (I Love Lucy): The best neighbors ever were probably Fred and Ethel Mertz from I Love Lucy. Fred was a bit of an old-fashioned fellow and was good for a laugh, but he never seriously came in between Lucy and Ethel's fun. And, what's better than a neighbor who is also your best friend? Lucy and Ethel hung out together all the time--they even got jobs together! And, when Lucy and Ricky decided to move out to the country, the best neighbors in the world followed them out there. That's priceless because you really can't choose your neighbors.
The Rubbles (The Flintstones): The Rubbles make even better neighbors than the Mertzes because they were both friends with Fred and Wilma Flintstone. Barney and Fred worked together and Barney was always just dopey enough to go along with any of Fred's hair-brained schemes. Barney was also a great fall guy because Fred could screw up royally and always find a way to blame it on Barney. Did Barney care or protest? Not really. Betty made a great pal for Wilma because they had kids the same age and obviously shopped at the same clothing stores and had the same hairdresser. The Rubbles always went along on Flintstone family vacations and were basically a good support mechanism for the dysfunctional marriage of the Flintstones.
The Fonz (Happy Days): If you can live with the noise from his motorcycle, Fonzie is really a great neighbor to have. Let's say you're kinda nerdy like Richie Cunningham. No problem! The Fonz is a cool dude--and he's actually a nice guy, too--and just being around him... hell, just knowing him automatically ups your cool quotient. He can teach you how to get hot chicks and how to just be cool, man. If you're a cutie like Joanie Cunningham, The Fonz is a great neighbor because you get to stare at eye candy all day. Plus, he has a sort-of protective side about him so you know he's going to come to your rescue if there's ever any trouble with another fella.
Wilson (Home Improvement): Forget therapy! Just walk outside and talk to your back fence. No matter what has you down--your wife, husband, kids or parents--Wilson can help you find a solution that works for everybody. Sure, his wisdom is a little far-out... and the fact that you never see his face might make you crazy with curiosity about whether he's been burned by boiling oil... but he always makes sense in the end. Plus, he's always right.
Winnie Cooper (The Wonder Years): I'm taking the male perspective on this one. Winnie Cooper is the prettiest girl in school and you live next door to her! She knows you, dude! Even though you're a tad bit nerdy and slow to go through puberty, Winnie still looks to you for companionship and advice when the world of a teen-ager just gets to be too hard. Plus, she's hot.