pirate4state
04-20-2007, 04:35 PM
I didn't find any lawyer jokes, but maybe this will help ;)
Priorities
An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?"
"Yes, I know," said the lady, "I need both hands to hold onto this
hat."
"But, madam, you must know that you are not wearing panties and your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest.
The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"
:D
OR
Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a
bloody 5-iron standing over a lifeless man. The detective asks,
"Ma'am, is that your husband?"
"Yes" says the woman.
"Did you hit him with that golf club?"
"Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her hands on her face.
"How many times did you hit him?
"I don't know, five, six, maybe seven times.... just put me down for a five."
:D
Priorities
An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: "Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?"
"Yes, I know," said the lady, "I need both hands to hold onto this
hat."
"But, madam, you must know that you are not wearing panties and your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest.
The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"
:D
OR
Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a
bloody 5-iron standing over a lifeless man. The detective asks,
"Ma'am, is that your husband?"
"Yes" says the woman.
"Did you hit him with that golf club?"
"Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her hands on her face.
"How many times did you hit him?
"I don't know, five, six, maybe seven times.... just put me down for a five."
:D