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smustangs
04-18-2007, 06:46 PM
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3. A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20

ft. room.

5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.

8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9. A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.

10. Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old Boy.

11. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12. Super glue is forever.

13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.

14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15. VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

20. The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

DU_stud04
04-18-2007, 06:54 PM
a big block of wood isnt a frisbee

dont ever talk to a girl name linette. she is crazy and her dad is in the mafia.

if something looks hot, it probly is.

cops are apples(hold you tongue and say it)

always be on your toes, once those heels touch, even a caveman can knock you on your behind.

Persian women are the work of the devil.

Persian women are the masterpiece from the devil.

dont sweat the small stuff.

dont lend money if you want it back.

even though its all you can eat....dont try and eat it all.

including thanksgiving.

and Christmas.

and any other big celebration.

some of the best things in life are free. take a look at the sunset, walk out on the beach.

credit cards are not the upscale version of "layway". who cares if you get it now and pay later, its not worth it.

people in dallas area hate the spurs, and anyone who wears a spurs jersey into a bar at 2am after spurs beat the mavs. it usually ends up in a fight.

dont ever wait to say something, say what you have to say when you have to say it, and make sure you say it. something like that shouldnt be unsaid.

making your own explosives sometimes goes wrong. and very bad.

never call a girl by the wrong name in bed.

homeless people are never at the fast food places.....catch them outside of walmart asking for a loaf of bread.

charity starts in my pocket, a penny saved is a penny earned.

never leave a girl on the lookout when your shooting water balloons off of a parking garage onto campus. they dont tell you when the cops get there...

720lbs on leg press isnt light and will hurt your knee if you already have a torn mcl.

never box a boxer unless you plan to lose.






Persian women are the devil.








i am an idiot.

bandera7
04-18-2007, 07:46 PM
ha these are all good...may I ask where you two compiled these

DU_stud04
04-18-2007, 07:46 PM
Originally posted by bandera7
ha these are all good...may I ask where you two compiled these all of mine are first hand experience...... :)

smustangs
04-18-2007, 07:47 PM
Originally posted by bandera7
ha these are all good...may I ask where you two compiled these

i got it on email but some of the list is first hand

bandera7
04-18-2007, 07:57 PM
wow...DU you have seen some weird stuff...care to explain the persian women?

DU_stud04
04-18-2007, 07:58 PM
Originally posted by bandera7
wow...DU you have seen some weird stuff...care to explain the persian women? they are the spawn of the devil....also my kryptonite :(

i have others that i shall leave off the board. :evil:

smustangs
04-18-2007, 09:12 PM
Originally posted by DU_stud04
they are the spawn of the devil....also my kryptonite :(

i have others that i shall leave off the board. :evil:

good i have heard a few of those and we would like to have you posting so dont post them cuz you will be gone ahah :devil:

DU_stud04
04-18-2007, 09:15 PM
Originally posted by smustangs
good i have heard a few of those and we would like to have you posting so dont post them cuz you will be gone ahah :devil: :D