Some Friday Humor

[Sftball4Life]

A young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says her body hurts wherever she touches it.

"That's strange," says the doctor. "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony.

She pushes her knee and screams; then she pushes her ankle and screams.

Everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor then asks, "You're not really a redhead, are you?"

"No," she says, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor says. "Your finger is broken." :D

[kaorder1999]

that is awesome!!!

[pirate4state]

LMAO! :D :D

Good one!

[DU_stud04]

:doh: :doh: :doh:

[HM33]

saw that coming :)

[AP Panther Fan]

:D

Things that make you go hmmmmmmm....

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And finally,
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.

[LH Panther Mom]

Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
This has my boys' names written all over it. :doh: :doh: :D (As they stand there waiting for something to jump out in their mouths. :doh: )

[AP Panther Fan]

Originally posted by LH Panther Mom
This has my boys' names written all over it. :doh: :doh: :D (As they stand there waiting for something to jump out in their mouths. :doh: )


LOL...I know, right?

My favorite was...Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?


that would be me alright... ;) :D

[LH Panther Mom]

Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
My favorite was...Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?


that would be me alright... ;) :D
Been there, done that! :D

[pirate4state]

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin.

However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks.

The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!

One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?"

"My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek.

:D :D :D

[stangGirl2007]

Originally posted by Sftball4Life
A young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says her body hurts wherever she touches it.

"That's strange," says the doctor. "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony.

She pushes her knee and screams; then she pushes her ankle and screams.

Everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor then asks, "You're not really a redhead, are you?"

"No," she says, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor says. "Your finger is broken." :D


:clap: I remember watching this comedy scene on an episode of the "Amazing Jonathan" show