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neck_06
01-09-2007, 11:43 PM
Excerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary:

8:00am Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30am A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40am walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30am Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00pm Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00pm Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00pm Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00pm Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00pm Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00pm Wow! Watched TV with my master! My favorite thing!
11:00pm Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary:

Day 683 of my captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and myself are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I
nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. The audacity!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released --and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. The captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe....... for now.

g$$
01-10-2007, 01:54 AM
Good post, & exactly why I love dogs & hate cats.

JJ7997
01-10-2007, 06:09 AM
Cats are evil, except Panthers of course.

piratebg
01-10-2007, 06:48 AM
I've often wondered what goes through the mind of a feline. Sometimes I think my cat is plotting to kill me. :helpme:

CenTexSports
01-10-2007, 08:27 AM
I think this could be retitled "Husbands and Wives."

pancho villa
01-10-2007, 08:37 AM
Originally posted by CenTexSports
I think this could be retitled "Husbands and Wives."

Or Sons and Daughters.

Johnnypaycheck
01-10-2007, 10:44 AM
best type of cat is a DEAD ONE!

DU_stud04
01-10-2007, 10:47 AM
cats are useless......

pirate4state
01-10-2007, 10:50 AM
Originally posted by g$$
Good post, & exactly why I love dogs & hate cats. :eek: :eek: Something ELSE we agree on!!! :eek: :eek:

g$$
01-10-2007, 05:30 PM
Originally posted by pirate4state
:eek: :eek: Something ELSE we agree on!!! :eek: :eek:

The world ends tomorrow! At least we have Seinfeld & dogs to keep us company.

Txbroadcaster
01-10-2007, 05:32 PM
I used to not like cats either, but my wife is a animal person period loves them all so I agreed to let her bring two cats from her childhood.

Now I love cats. People think they are aloof, well that is all in how you raise them. Her cats are always wanting to love on you and be loved, and they crave attention.

We now have 5 cats and 2 dogs..I love them all each for their own personality and quirks

crzyjournalist03
01-10-2007, 06:14 PM
Is it just me, or does the "cat" remind anybody else of Stewie Griffin?

luvhoops34
01-10-2007, 10:33 PM
I'm a dog person myself. And my dogs don't like cats...soooo

Some cats are ok. The ones that have personalities like dogs. LOL

But those are few and far between.

espn1
01-10-2007, 10:56 PM
Originally posted by JJ7997
Cats are evil, except Panthers of course. No they're not. They're very loyal and loving. Take Sadam's Cat for example.:D :D :D
http://www.grtm.us/sadam/SadamsCat.gif

SintonFan
01-10-2007, 11:05 PM
Originally posted by DU_stud04
cats are useless......
.
The Chinese have found a use for them.
CLICK HERE! (http://www.superlaugh.com/1/chowmein.swf)
.
lol
That was a good one too espn1.:D

bandera7
01-10-2007, 11:11 PM
great post. Like it was said, the only cool cats are the ones that act like dogs. So we should all just stick with dogs.