kinky friedman quotes (humor)

[IHS Fan]

KINKY FRIEDMAN HUMOR. . .

Kinky Friedman may not be familiar to non-Texans, but his humor and insight are worth reading. If he is elected, Texas is in for a ride that has not been seen since the Alamo !
Quotes from Kinky Friedman, Independent candidate for Governor of Texas:

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder."

"I admit I was drinking a beer, but I did not swallow."

"A man without a woman is like a neck without pain."

"If you elect me the first Jewish governor, I will increase the speed limit to 74.95."

"I want to see Texas No. 1 in something besides toll-roads, executions, and property taxes."

"I can take criticisms, but please, no more circumcisions."

"In response to autograph seekers, "I'll sign anything except bad &gzt; legislation."

"Yes, I smoke Cuban cigars, but actually I am just burning their fields."

"She would look good with a number of things on her, one of which is me."

"Cats have so much insight -- they can't stand lawyers."

"God created whiskey to keep the Irish from taking over the world."

"A fool and his money are soon elected."

"Career politicians are keeping the elevator at the penthouse floor and
won't let it come down to get the rest of us."

"I'm a Jew. I'll hire good people."

"The only thing current Governor Perry has done is make George W. look smart."

"I'm too young for Medi care and too old for women to care."

"If I'm elected, the first thing I will do is demand a recount."

[AggieJohn]

exactly why i don't want him, he's a gimmick candidate

[Bull19]

HED BE A GREAT, WE NEED SOMEBODY LIKE HIM IN OFFICE

[bulldogman06]

If I want to elect an idiot i will vote for Perry.

[AggieJohn]

Originally posted by bulldogman06
If I want to elect an idiot i will vote for Perry. yeah, i'm not happy with any of the candidates.

Kinky says:
"I'm not pro-choice, I'm not pro-life, I'm pro-football"
Don't like a poltician that thinks that.

Perry hasn't done anything in office, and I'm a REGISTERED REPUBLICAN.

Bell says:
Whose Bell?

Strayhorn is just old and kind of out there....

[Bandera YaYa]

Kinky will NEVER win in TExas.....now maybe he should go run for office in California!! He's a jerk...makes me embarrassed..blah!!! :rolleyes:

[pirate44]

Originally posted by AggieJohn
yeah, i'm not happy with any of the candidates.

Kinky says:
"I'm not pro-choice, I'm not pro-life, I'm pro-football"
Don't like a poltician that thinks that.

Perry hasn't done anything in office, and I'm a REGISTERED REPUBLICAN.

Bell says:
Whose Bell?

Strayhorn is just old and kind of out there....
i say injuredinmelee for guvna

[EricDraven]

I say George Strait.

[luvhoops34]

Have yall read any of Kinky's books? They are really good and quite humorous.

[AggieJohn]

Originally posted by Bandera YaYa
Kinky will NEVER win in TExas.....now maybe he should go run for office in California!! He's a jerk...makes me embarrassed..blah!!! :rolleyes: scary thing is that he's currently in second place

[pirate44]

in all seriousness, Nolan Ryan would make a great governor. he has all the great qualities.

[EricDraven]

Kinky is funny, funny as heck. But I'm not sure that qualifies him to be a good governor.

If you ever get a chance to see his interview on MSNBC with Donny Duestch(sp?), it's a classic. Has Duetch-bag spitting and stutterin' the whole time.

[PHS Wildcats]

Yea, he the same guy that said the "N" word is a compliment to african-americans:mad: He also said that the Katrina evacuees were all crackheads and thugs

I would never vote for him. He's not funny at all.:mad:

[AggieJohn]

Originally posted by PHS Wildcats
Yea, he the same guy that said the "N" word is a compliment to african-americans:mad: He also said that the Katrina evacuees were all crackheads and thugs

I would never vote for him. He's not funny at all.:mad: exactly, he's very giimmicky

[PHS Wildcats]

Originally posted by AggieJohn
exactly, he's very giimmicky

I can't believe we actually agree on something.............did you feel that? the earth moved!!!:clap:

[AggieJohn]

Originally posted by PHS Wildcats
I can't believe we actually agree on something.............did you feel that? the earth moved!!!:clap: no that was my stomach

[pirate44]

its just one big love fest today

[PHS Wildcats]

If he's voted into office, I'll move out of Texas:mad:

[griff]

Originally posted by PHS Wildcats
If he's voted into office, I'll move out of Texas:mad:

No you won't. You love Texas too much. :D

Kinky will never get elected. He's a goof ball candidtae who's picking up where Clayton Williams left off.

He wants to become for Texas what the late Gov. Huey Long was for Louisiana.

[PHS Wildcats]

Originally posted by griff
No you won't. You love Texas too much. :D

Kinky will never get elected. He's a goof ball candidtae who's picking up where Clayton Williams left off.

He wants to become for Texas what the late Gov. Huey Long was for Louisiana.

AWWW!! You know me so well " I heart Texas"!!!

[Bandera YaYa]

Originally posted by PHS Wildcats
Yea, he the same guy that said the "N" word is a compliment to african-americans:mad: He also said that the Katrina evacuees were all crackheads and thugs

I would never vote for him. He's not funny at all.:mad: Did anyone see him yesterday on TV, he was at UTSA talking to some students, with that cigar hanging outta his mouth....talking out his...... :D

[SWMustang]

Kinky's secreteary of Fashion...


http://i80.photobucket.com/albums/j200/pattonwb/alig_dapics_4.jpg

[BTEXDAD]

I'm republican, but can agree that Rick Perry is a joke. However, voting Kinky in would make Texas the joke around the country. Not sure how i'm voting yet.