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View Full Version : Chuck Norris kills Johnny P



GreenMonster
07-29-2006, 05:32 AM
Apparently, Johnny P got careless this morning and sleepwalked into a dirtnap courtesy of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse kick. No further information is available at this time.

AggieJohn
07-29-2006, 08:57 AM
that's actually my nickname

hawkfan
07-29-2006, 10:11 AM
Oh yeah, well I heard that they offered the lead role in the show 24 to Chuck Norris, but changed their minds when they realized they had to change the title of the show to 4 minutes.

columbus18
08-01-2006, 12:35 AM
You don't know Johnny P. ....one time he swung the baseball bat so fast that it went back in time and hit chuck norris in the face and put him in a coma, that's why nobody's heard of him since walker texas ranger or sidekicks.

IHStangFan
08-01-2006, 01:02 AM
I heard that Chuck Norris, w/ the help of J.J. Walker and Cheech Marin.....were able to collectively talk Johnny P. into quitting baseball all together and take up reversi. He is the current reigning internet champion. (only cause Chuck Norris doesnt play reversi...as he thinks its for sissies and wussyboys)

piratebg
08-01-2006, 01:44 AM
Who in the heck is Johnny P? :confused:

garageoffice
08-01-2006, 02:32 AM
Originally posted by IHStangFan
I heard that Chuck Norris, w/ the help of J.J. Walker and Cheech Marin.....were able to collectively talk Johnny P. into quitting baseball all together and take up reversi. He is the current reigning internet champion. (only cause Chuck Norris doesnt play reversi...as he thinks its for sissies and wussyboys)

See? Here's a perfect example of how stories get messed up in the telling. It was actually Chuck Norris, Richard Simmons and a transvestite showgirl from Las Vegas that talked with Johnny P. They convinced him quit baseball in favor of a full-time career playing video games. And yes, he is the current reigning all-around champion. The first-person shooters are his favorites. Anytime he runs out of ammo he just reaches into the screen and strangles his enemies with his bare hands. Powerups? Who needs power ups? He's magically in invincibility mode all the time.