44INAROW
08-07-2005, 09:09 PM
Sensible Observations
"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base." --Dave Barry
"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh." --Conan O'Brien
"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery
"I think that's how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni
"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." --Johnny Carson
"Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." --Paul Rodriguez
"My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." --Jerry Seinfeld
"Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde
"Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan." --A. Whitney Brown
Do you know why they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was taken. --Unknown, presumed deceased
"Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer." - W. C. Fields
The last one was just for you Gobbla :)
"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there is a man on base." --Dave Barry
"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: "Duh." --Conan O'Brien
"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God.... I could be eating a slow learner." --Lynda Montgomery
"I think that's how Chicago got started. Bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough. Let's go west.'" --Richard Jeni
"If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead." --Johnny Carson
"Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography." --Paul Rodriguez
"My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." --Jerry Seinfeld
"Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde
"Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Afghanistan." --A. Whitney Brown
Do you know why they call it "PMS"? Because "Mad Cow Disease" was taken. --Unknown, presumed deceased
"Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer." - W. C. Fields
The last one was just for you Gobbla :)