robbo93
05-17-2005, 06:10 AM
All idiots, beware!
By John Ryan, Mercury News
We humbly disagree with Ken Macha. The A's manager didn't appreciate Eric Byrnes' flying tackle of the idiot who ran onto the field Sunday. Replays were scarce, too, the thinking being, Let's not encourage this behavior.
Show it, Morning Buzz says. Show the whole thing. Show Byrnes slamming full-force into The Idiot. And instead of printing "Violators Will Be Arrested" on the back of each ticket, hand out the picture of that poor guy against the wall, not knowing what shoulda-been-safety hit him. Maybe a heightened fear of personal injury will deter the nonsense.
Either that, or give only non-alcoholic beer to the fans and decaf to Byrnes.
This moment is one of dozens in sports that range from frightening (Monica Seles' attacker) to frivolous (Morganna The Kissing Bandit). Our five most noteworthy:
• Biggest idiot: The Philly fan who dived into the penalty box in 2001 and started a fight with Tie Domi. (And even if you're not a hockey fan, you know that's like sharing a pizza with Michael Moore.)
• Most symbolic: In 1976, Cubs outfielder Rick Monday waylaid two fans who were trying to set fire to the American flag. No doubt Byrnes, with his Captain America persona, would be honored to be in such company.
• Most vicious: In 1971, a Baltimore fan scooped up a loose ball and made for the end zone -- until linebacker Mike Curtis clotheslined him and knocked him out cold. "The guy broke a city ordinance, and I was enforcing it," he said.
• Most fortunate: John Murray of Chicago charged the mound after Cubs reliever Randy Myers gave up a home run in the midst of a tight wild-card race. Murray was unaware -- at least we hope he was, or we'd have a tie for biggest idiot -- of Myers' extensive martial-arts training. "I was afraid Randy was going to snap his neck," Cubs shortstop Shawon Dunston said. "I would have gotten sick, thrown up on the spot."
• Most acceptable: In 1996, as Richard Krajicek and MaliVai Washington prepared for the Wimbledon final, a 23-year-old London woman streaked across center court. They stood and smiled appreciatively.
By John Ryan, Mercury News
We humbly disagree with Ken Macha. The A's manager didn't appreciate Eric Byrnes' flying tackle of the idiot who ran onto the field Sunday. Replays were scarce, too, the thinking being, Let's not encourage this behavior.
Show it, Morning Buzz says. Show the whole thing. Show Byrnes slamming full-force into The Idiot. And instead of printing "Violators Will Be Arrested" on the back of each ticket, hand out the picture of that poor guy against the wall, not knowing what shoulda-been-safety hit him. Maybe a heightened fear of personal injury will deter the nonsense.
Either that, or give only non-alcoholic beer to the fans and decaf to Byrnes.
This moment is one of dozens in sports that range from frightening (Monica Seles' attacker) to frivolous (Morganna The Kissing Bandit). Our five most noteworthy:
• Biggest idiot: The Philly fan who dived into the penalty box in 2001 and started a fight with Tie Domi. (And even if you're not a hockey fan, you know that's like sharing a pizza with Michael Moore.)
• Most symbolic: In 1976, Cubs outfielder Rick Monday waylaid two fans who were trying to set fire to the American flag. No doubt Byrnes, with his Captain America persona, would be honored to be in such company.
• Most vicious: In 1971, a Baltimore fan scooped up a loose ball and made for the end zone -- until linebacker Mike Curtis clotheslined him and knocked him out cold. "The guy broke a city ordinance, and I was enforcing it," he said.
• Most fortunate: John Murray of Chicago charged the mound after Cubs reliever Randy Myers gave up a home run in the midst of a tight wild-card race. Murray was unaware -- at least we hope he was, or we'd have a tie for biggest idiot -- of Myers' extensive martial-arts training. "I was afraid Randy was going to snap his neck," Cubs shortstop Shawon Dunston said. "I would have gotten sick, thrown up on the spot."
• Most acceptable: In 1996, as Richard Krajicek and MaliVai Washington prepared for the Wimbledon final, a 23-year-old London woman streaked across center court. They stood and smiled appreciatively.