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View Full Version : Gov. Kinky Friedman "to fight the wussification of Texas."



pirate44
01-19-2005, 10:41 AM
yet another sign the apocalypse is upon us:


DALLAS (Reuters) - Kinky Friedman, the best-selling author, country singer and friend of the stray dog, next week will officially toss his ten-gallon hat into the ring for the 2006 Texas governor's race, his campaign said Tuesday.

Friedman will announce his bid to run as an independent on Feb. 3 near the Alamo from a hotel where former U.S. President Teddy Roosevelt founded the Rough Riders.

Friedman, frontman for the group "The Texas Jewboys," is known for songs such as "Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed" and writing books including "Kill Two Birds and Get Stoned."

The humorist however, is deadly serious about his campaign to unseat current Gov. Rick Perry, a Republican who succeeded President Bush.

"I have achieved a lot of my dreams in life and I want to see that young Texans achieve some of theirs,' Friedman said in a telephone interview. He added, "I want to be governor because I need the closet space."

Friedman said the main priorities in his campaign will be reforming the Texas education system, adding safeguards in the judicial process where Texas ranks as the nation's leader in capital punishment and establishing a peace corps for the state.

Plus, he wants "to fight the wussification of Texas."

"I am determined to get back to a time when the cowboys all sang and their horses were smart," Friedman said.

Friedman would like to borrow a page or two from the campaign books of other celebrity candidates such as California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jesse Ventura, the former pro wrestler who ran as an independent to become governor of Minnesota.

Political observers said the Friedman campaign will be entertaining, but it will be hard for an independent to win in Texas, where every major statewide office is held by a Republican.

"The real race will be within the Republican primary," said Sherri Greenberg, a former Texas legislator who now teaches at the University of Texas LBJ School of Public Affairs.

The Republican primary for governor of Texas is shaping up be a bruising affair. Likely candidate Texas Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn has been firing shots at incumbent Perry for several years and U.S. Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison may also take on Perry in the primary.

Friedman has said he expects his campaign to be unconventional, irreverent and star-studded. He knows it will be tough to win in the heavily Republican state, but he thinks he can win votes from people fed up with bland politicians.

"We hope the people of Texas are going to reject the choice of paper or plastic," he said.

pirate44
01-19-2005, 10:42 AM
Originally posted by pirate44
"Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed"

ROFL:D :clap:

Bullaholic
01-19-2005, 10:48 AM
Yea, but can he look as good as ol' Ric in the photo ops? He might not know where the camera is, may not have a piano keyboard smile, or have a $100 coiffure...

pirate44
01-19-2005, 10:58 AM
http://img62.exs.cx/img62/5233/ceegar2ui.jpg
C'mon, that is pure photogenic stuff there!

Bullaholic
01-19-2005, 11:09 AM
Originally posted by pirate44
http://img62.exs.cx/img62/5233/ceegar2ui.jpg
C'mon, that is pure photogenic stuff there!

LoL....This guy's got my vote,for sure..

AP Panther Fan
01-19-2005, 11:32 AM
I certainly don't think he could do any worse that what we have now!

Someone just needs to walk up to Gov. Perry and mess his hair up! The Texas education system needs reforming and I don't like any of his ideas.:rolleyes:

pirate44
01-19-2005, 11:39 AM
Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
I certainly don't think he could do any worse that what we have now!

Someone just needs to walk up to Gov. Perry and mess his hair up! The Texas education system needs reforming and I don't like any of his ideas.:rolleyes:
School Lunch Menu
(according to gov. Freidman's edumacation policy)

Monday
Weed
Tequila

Tuesday
Weed
Tequila

Wednesday
Weed
Tequila

Thursday
Hamburger/Cheeseburger
whole kernel corn
hamburger salad
fruited geletin w/topping
milk

Friday
Weed
Tequila

District303aPastPlayer
01-19-2005, 11:43 AM
Gotta have hamburgers on thursdays

pirate44
01-19-2005, 11:43 AM
Originally posted by District303aPastPlayer
Gotta have hamburgers on thursdays
tradition is tradition :D

AP Panther Fan
01-19-2005, 12:13 PM
Originally posted by District303aPastPlayer
Gotta have hamburgers on thursdays

ROFLMAO.... :D

spiveyrat
01-19-2005, 01:23 PM
Funny! This reminds me of the Governator's "Girlie men" commment. :D

Gilmer Buckeye
01-19-2005, 02:25 PM
The solution to the school finance problem is privatization. If it's good enough for Social Security, it's good enough for the public schools. An overwhelming percentage of Texans voted for Republicans and it is time to implement the Republicans' solutions. This is clearly what the people want.

raider red 2000
01-19-2005, 03:52 PM
in both cases i think that privitization is a horrible idea. if a person chooses to take their kid out of school and send him/her to private school that is fine, but taking out money to fund it is also bad. also, as far as SS goes if one chooses to put money into something risky such as stock market do it with your own money. the only way that either have a chance at surviving is if everyone supports it.

taking out money helps the haves and hurts the have nots. people already complain about many things such as education and then their solution is to get rid of it. kids and old people are not computers or cd players or calculators we can not and should not try to outsource them.

raider red 2000
01-19-2005, 03:54 PM
i think that kinky would be a decent governor. he seems to have morals and is a normal person. shouldnt a normal person represent normal people. why would i want someone with a different agenda that me representing me?

pirate44
01-19-2005, 03:59 PM
Originally posted by raider red 2000
he seems to have morals and is a normal person.
:eek:
i think i am having another twighlight zone moment

bullfrog_alumni_02
01-19-2005, 04:00 PM
Originally posted by raider red 2000
i think that kinky would be a decent governor. he seems to have morals and is a normal person. shouldnt a normal person represent normal people. why would i want someone with a different agenda that me representing me? i can see his campaign slogan now "KINKY'S MORALS" wait whats wrong w/ this picture again?!?!?! :D i do agree though, most of the republicans solutions would fix the problems existing today.

pirate44
01-19-2005, 04:07 PM
he can run on the platform of stamping out mental health

raider red 2000
01-19-2005, 04:08 PM
i read where kinky wants laura bush to help him with education....so i did a google search for "kinky bush" whoa buddy...i need to think through things a lil more.

as for his morals......what has he done so bad?

i am sure our last few leaders have done worse.

pirate44
01-19-2005, 04:16 PM
Originally posted by raider red 2000
so i did a google search for "kinky bush" whoa buddy...i need to think through things a lil more.
whoa man, its too late in the day to be laughing this hard. :D

pirate44
01-19-2005, 05:55 PM
Originally posted by pirate44
"Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed"

lyrics to "Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed" by Kinky Freidman and the Texas Jewboys

You uppity women I don’t understand
Why you gotta go and try to act like a man,
But before you make your weekly visit to the shrink
You’d better occupy the kitchen, liberate the sink.

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed
That’s what I to my baby said,
Women’s liberation is a-going to your head,
Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed.

Early every morning you’re out on the street
Passing out pamphlets to everyone you meet.
You gave up your maiden form for lent
And now the front of your dress has an air scoop vent.

Every single brakeman that’s ever come along
Had a little woman always tellin’ him that he’s wrong.
Eve said to adam, ¡°here’s an apple you horse¡±
And delilah defoliated samson’s moss.

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed
That’s what I to my baby said,
Women’s liberation is a-going to your head,
Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed.

Mean-hearted harpies are breaking all the laws
Tearing up their girdles and a-burning up their bras,
Now the air is dirty and the sex is clean
And your coffee makes my hair turn green.

So damn emancipated in your mind and your body,
Gonna have to cancel all your lessons in karate.
If you can’t love a male chauvinist
You’d better cross me off your shopping list.

Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed
That’s what I to my baby said,
Women’s liberation is a-going to your head,
Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed.

SintonFan
01-19-2005, 09:23 PM
Originally posted by pirate44
School Lunch Menu
(according to gov. Freidman's edumacation policy)

Monday
Weed
Tequila

Tuesday
Weed
Tequila

Wednesday
Weed
Tequila

Thursday
Hamburger/Cheeseburger
whole kernel corn
hamburger salad
fruited geletin w/topping
milk

Friday
Weed
Tequila

he can run on the platform of stamping out mental health
.
Roflmao!:clap:

Astrosdawg07
01-19-2005, 10:41 PM
Originally posted by pirate44
School Lunch Menu
(according to gov. Freidman's edumacation policy)

Monday
Weed
Tequila

Tuesday
Weed
Tequila

Wednesday
Weed
Tequila

Thursday
Hamburger/Cheeseburger
whole kernel corn
hamburger salad
fruited geletin w/topping
milk

Friday
Weed
Tequila

Hey quit making fun of Jasper & Newton....:D

pirate44
01-19-2005, 10:42 PM
Originally posted by Astrosdawg07
Hey quit making fun of Jasper & Newton....:D
lol..and a few select schools in Corpus Christi

LH Panther Mom
01-20-2005, 07:22 AM
Man, what a boring lunch menu! Mondays & Wednesdays need to be Tequila and Weed! ;)

Since Leslie (the homeless transvestite) got 3000 votes for mayor of Austin, I would imagine that Kinky would probably get 75% of the votes in Austin for governor. I can see the new slogan now....."Keep Austin Weird & Kinky". :eek: :D

pirate44
01-20-2005, 08:15 AM
Originally posted by LH Panther Mom
Man, what a boring lunch menu! Mondays & Wednesdays need to be Tequila and Weed! ;)

Since Leslie (the homeless transvestite) got 3000 votes for mayor of Austin, I would imagine that Kinky would probably get 75% of the votes in Austin for governor. I can see the new slogan now....."Keep Austin Weird & Kinky". :eek: :D
LOL
to tell ya the truth, if Kay Baily stays out of the race, Kinky has a great chance. he is an elequent speaker and has a quick wit. very endearing. if he has the slightest bit of substance to him, he could pull in more than a few votes.

AP Panther Fan
01-20-2005, 09:40 AM
If California can have an actor....I think Texas should have someone unique as well! If he shows he has half a brain and is truly genuine....he would probably get my vote!:D

pirate44
01-20-2005, 09:47 AM
Originally posted by AP Panther Fan
If California can have an actor....I think Texas should have someone unique as well! If he shows he has half a brain and is truly genuine....he would probably get my vote!:D
i make fun of him and probably polar opposite of his stand on social issues, but he is the epitome of an anti-politician. he makes Jesse ventura look like Bill Clinton (politically speaking of course). he would be like having an articulate Willie Nelson in the gov. mansion.

Bullaholic
01-20-2005, 10:06 AM
Originally posted by pirate44
i make fun of him and probably polar opposite of his stand on social issues, but he is the epitome of an anti-politician. he makes Jesse ventura look like Bill Clinton (politically speaking of course). he would be like having an articulate Willie Nelson in the gov. mansion.

P44....I think Willy is still "weeding" out the opposition, but he is "high" on running though.....maybe he and Kinky could form a "joint" ticket and finance it by making a movie sequel to "Up In Smoke".

AP Panther Fan
01-20-2005, 10:09 AM
Originally posted by Bullaholic
P44....I think Willy is still "weeding" out the opposition, but he is "high" on running though.....maybe he and Kinky could form a "joint" ticket and finance it by making a movie sequel to "Up In Smoke".

LOL....SOMEONE is on their toes today! :thumbsup:

pirate44
01-20-2005, 10:17 AM
Originally posted by Bullaholic
P44....I think Willy is still "weeding" out the opposition, but he is "high" on running though.....maybe he and Kinky could form a "joint" ticket and finance it by making a movie sequel to "Up In Smoke".
lol
did anyone read the article written by Kinky in Texas Monthly several months ago about him and Pat Green drinking $60 shots of don julio real tequila at a wedding party in Mexico? great story.

pirate44
01-20-2005, 10:20 AM
Originally posted by pirate44
lol
did anyone read the article written by Kinky in Texas Monthly several months ago about him and Pat Green drinking $60 shots of don julio real tequila at a wedding party in Mexico? great story.
that article wasnt in this issue, but i love the cover
http://img68.exs.cx/img68/9228/txmoncover3ec.jpg

Bullaholic
01-20-2005, 10:23 AM
Originally posted by pirate44
that article wasnt in this issue, but i love the cover
http://img68.exs.cx/img68/9228/txmoncover3ec.jpg


Yep P44, I think this cover was one of the first that PPHSFan did in his career, and helped to propel him to stardom....

pirate44
01-20-2005, 10:32 AM
Originally posted by Bullaholic
Yep P44, I think this cover was one of the first that PPHSFan did in his career, and helped to propel him to stardom....
LOL, i didnt know PPHSFan was a regular "joe" by day and a superhero (Queen Satirist Guy) by night.