Cam
11-27-2013, 11:28 PM
I'm thankful all my babies are home for a few days, for everyone's good health, well, for the most part....snagged the ol' left testicle tryin' to go between a barbed wire fence!....I'm thankful I live in Texas, thankful Burnet is still playing ball......and I'm especially thankful I'm not a turkey!!......
I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldn’t the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium?
On Thanksgiving Day, all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment ..... halftime.
A lady was looking for a turkey but couldn't find one big enough. She asked the stock boy "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied "No they're dead."
Bob and Martha have been married for 15 years. Every morning for 15 years, Bob wakes up, farts loudly, rolls over onto his back and gets up for work.
Every morning for 15 years, Martha says, "One of these days, you're gonna fart your guts out!"
One Thanksgiving morning, Martha's preparing the turkey and gets an idea. Before her husband gets up, she creeps upstairs and places the turkey innards in his pajama bottoms, giggling to herself.
Well, later that morning, Bob wakes up and goes through his morning ritual. He screams as he goes running into the bathroom. Martha laughs, but is concerned after noticing that Bob has been in the bathroom for 3 hours.
She runs upstairs, and is about to knock on the door, when Bob opens up, pale as a ghost. He says, "You were right. You were right. I did fart my guts out, but by the grace of God and these two fingers I got them back up there again."
I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldn’t the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium?
On Thanksgiving Day, all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment ..... halftime.
A lady was looking for a turkey but couldn't find one big enough. She asked the stock boy "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied "No they're dead."
Bob and Martha have been married for 15 years. Every morning for 15 years, Bob wakes up, farts loudly, rolls over onto his back and gets up for work.
Every morning for 15 years, Martha says, "One of these days, you're gonna fart your guts out!"
One Thanksgiving morning, Martha's preparing the turkey and gets an idea. Before her husband gets up, she creeps upstairs and places the turkey innards in his pajama bottoms, giggling to herself.
Well, later that morning, Bob wakes up and goes through his morning ritual. He screams as he goes running into the bathroom. Martha laughs, but is concerned after noticing that Bob has been in the bathroom for 3 hours.
She runs upstairs, and is about to knock on the door, when Bob opens up, pale as a ghost. He says, "You were right. You were right. I did fart my guts out, but by the grace of God and these two fingers I got them back up there again."