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OldNavy
08-03-2011, 11:02 AM
farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them
from laying hard boiled eggs.

the cows are giving evaporated milk.

the trees are whistlin' for the dogs.

even the sun was looking for some shade!

the birds had to pick up the worms with potholders.

I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walkin'...
OldNavy
08-03-2011, 11:28 AM
the politicians take their hands out of your pockets to fan themselves.

you wish you had gotten the cloth seats instead of leather.

you are sweating in both directions -- up and down!

you are sitting inside reading these jokes.

your brother's braces make blisters on his lips.
bobcat1
08-03-2011, 11:30 AM
I might add that the grasshoppers are farting dust with the lack of rain.
bwdlionfan
08-03-2011, 11:34 AM
It's so hot squirrels are pouring Gatorade on their nuts

It's so hot Bill Clinton got a slurpee and then went to 7/11.
MGAR
08-03-2011, 11:39 AM
haha.. bwd... you must of seen the same place I saw.. I was about to put those.
MGAR
08-03-2011, 11:41 AM
It's so hot, I can roast marshmallows on my belly... bwhahaha
GrTigers6
08-03-2011, 11:46 AM
Its so hot, you have to get in the hot tub to cool off!!!
bwdlionfan
08-03-2011, 11:48 AM
haha.. bwd... you must of seen the same place I saw.. I was about to put those.

Probably so, those were the best I could find
Txbroadcaster
08-03-2011, 11:51 AM
farmes are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them
from laying hard boiled eggs.

the cows are giving evaporated milk.

the trees are whistlin' for the dogs.

even the sun was looking for some shade!

the birds had to pick up the worms with potholders.

I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walkin'...

Our Australian Cattle Dog was an outside dog since we got him in 07..last year because of fence issues he has been an inside dog..he usually when he would go outside would torment the stray cats and chase them for fun..yesterday I let him out and he went and did his buisness and then walked over to a stray cat and simply laid down next to to it lol and they neither bothered to move lol
bwdlionfan
08-03-2011, 11:56 AM
Our two dogs are outside dogs but we've been bringing them in from about noon or 1 until 6-7ish when they go back outside. I dug a goldfish pond several months back and have some fish in there, I've been adding fresh water to it along with ice each afternoon to keep the fish from cooking.
SHSBulldog00
08-03-2011, 12:02 PM
the swans in the park come in "original recipe" and "extra crispy."

Joggers are now on the Endangered Species list.

the corn growing in the fields has popped.

you go to a car wash and walk through the tunnel and leave your car outside.
SintonFan
08-03-2011, 12:17 PM
It's so hot the retirement home is having a wet T-shirt contest.
GrTigers6
08-03-2011, 12:25 PM
It's so hot the retirement home is having a wet T-shirt contest.Thats a real disturbing image,:1omg!::helpme:
SintonFan
08-03-2011, 12:25 PM
Thats a real disturbing image,:1omg!::helpme:

I got it from G2's blog.
Trashman
08-03-2011, 02:09 PM
It's so hot in Brownwood that..............

The Rabbit Sheriff is dusting catfish at Lake Brownwood for ticks.
The Red Cross has launched a wet blanket appeal.
The Police Department has set up a water gun buyback program.
Cattle are producing powdered milk.
BaseballUmp
08-03-2011, 02:16 PM
It's so hot that all of you must have forgotten what a funny joke looks like...
OldNavy
08-03-2011, 03:00 PM
From the Dallas Morning News:

Oppressive heat puts area high school coaches on high alert
MARK DENT


Published Aug 1, 2011 10:23 PM

Denton Ryan coach Joey Florence, never one to shy away from a home-spun tale, said that on his way to school for his team’s first practice Monday, he saw a coyote chasing a rabbit.

“It was so hot,” Florence said, “they were both walking.”
GrTigers6
08-03-2011, 03:39 PM
I got it from G2's blog.That doesnt make it any better.:D
YTBulldogs
08-03-2011, 04:59 PM
Not only is it hot, it's so dern dry, the pissants can't.
1st and goal
08-03-2011, 09:58 PM
Drier than a west Texas popcorn f@rt.

So hot it's even hotta
than Sophia Vergara.(barely)

http://www.sofiavergara.com/
Ernest T Bass
08-03-2011, 10:01 PM
It's so hot, it's extremely uncomfortable to be outside for any extended period of time.
eagles_victory
08-03-2011, 10:22 PM
It's so hot in Brownwood that..............

The Rabbit Sheriff is dusting catfish at Lake Brownwood for ticks.
The Red Cross has launched a wet blanket appeal.
The Police Department has set up a water gun buyback program.
Cattle are producing powdered milk. It is so hot Shipley finally got up off the turf to go inside. (Coach joke)

It is so hot I havent seen anyone sweat like me since Abilene Wylies enrollment was being counted.