More toilet thoughts

[Cam]

I've always wanted to setup a hidden camera, stick some professional lookin' stickers on the toilet paper packages in a grocery store that say, "Dingleberry Free!" and see how people react. Afterall, dingleberries are a serious issue. Nobody wants em', nobody can stop em'. The harrier the ass, the worse it becomes. Sometimes the hair isn't even the cause. It's the super soft toilet paper. That red Charmin for example...forget it! DB's of record proportions are possible with that stuff! If you don't want the doctor to perform a prostrate exam on your next checkup, just make sure you have a few DB's on ya. He won't touch you! I cringe if I walk into a bathroom and see a loosened DB on the toilet seat or worse yet, the floor. I've danced around those things in some bathrooms! Someone once told me that wet baby wipes work real well and prevent DB's. Problems with those is you'll feel you got licked by something for awhile...The first company that invents DB free TP is the first company I'll buy stock from...
Let's all hope for the day we become a nation that's DB free! If we can conquer that problem, we can do anything!!!
The official definition:
3.(slang) A small piece of feces clumped to hair around the anus.
pos yo no se....
:doh:

[big daddy russ]

You hit the nail on the head. To prevent this...
http://www.tvworthwatching.com/blog/2008/11/17/BEAR-AD-paper-on-butt.jpg

...I use these...

http://www.jabberingjessi.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/cottonellefresh.jpg

[Sweetwater Red]

Originally posted by Cam
I've always wanted to setup a hidden camera, stick some professional lookin' stickers on the toilet paper packages in a grocery store that say, "Dingleberry Free!" and see how people react. Afterall, dingleberries are a serious issue. Nobody wants em', nobody can stop em'. The harrier the ass, the worse it becomes. Sometimes the hair isn't even the cause. It's the super soft toilet paper. That red Charmin for example...forget it! DB's of record proportions are possible with that stuff! If you don't want the doctor to perform a prostrate exam on your next checkup, just make sure you have a few DB's on ya. He won't touch you! I cringe if I walk into a bathroom and see a loosened DB on the toilet seat or worse yet, the floor. I've danced around those things in some bathrooms! Someone once told me that wet baby wipes work real well and prevent DB's. Problems with those is you'll feel you got licked by something for awhile...The first company that invents DB free TP is the first company I'll buy stock from...
Let's all hope for the day we become a nation that's DB free! If we can conquer that problem, we can do anything!!!
The official definition:
3.(slang) A small piece of feces clumped to hair around the anus.
pos yo no se....
:doh:

Damn dude. What are you eating? Because I'm thinking you either need to change your diet
or start wiping your ass better after each visit to the restroom. I've never had DBs and the
red Charmin is a staple at my house.

[Blastoderm55]

I've given up the fight against dingleberries. There is no winning. May as well just shower after pinching a loaf. What's bad is having to go right after showering. May as well just start your whole day over. :mad:

[big daddy russ]

Originally posted by Blastoderm55
I've given up the fight against dingleberries. There is no winning. May as well just shower after pinching a loaf. What's bad is having to go right after showering. May as well just start your whole day over. :mad:
You can always employ a skid plate. Two squares of TP folded that will protect your underwear from skid marks.

[Blastoderm55]

Originally posted by big daddy russ
You can always employ a skid plate. Two squares of TP folded that will protect your underwear from skid marks.

I don't mind the skid marks. I mind the sickening feeling that still have poo between my cheeks. :(

[big daddy russ]

Originally posted by Blastoderm55
I don't mind the skid marks. I mind the sickening feeling that still have poo between my cheeks. :(
The worst was playing sports. You never get used to your cheeks sliding around while you're running.

[PPHSfan]

We have a bidet in the master bathroom. It's the greatest appliance in the house.

[SintonFan]

Originally posted by Sweetwater Red
Damn dude. What are you eating? Because I'm thinking you either need to change your diet
or start wiping your ass better after each visit to the restroom. I've never had DBs and the
red Charmin is a staple at my house.

Any Man who says he never had a dingleberry is most likely lying or doesn't own body hair. What are you? 100% Indian? :D :p

[GrTigers6]

This conversation has really turned CRAPPY! :D

[greendawg84]

All conversations turn to #$%^

[Ranger Mom]

WOW!!:doh:

Football season REALLY needs to get here!!

[Farmersfan]

For all you dingleberry sufferers let me recommend one thing:



WAXING!!! :eek: :eek:


Let me know how it goes? :D :D

[RoyceTTU]

Originally posted by big daddy russ
You can always employ a skid plate. Two squares of TP folded that will protect your underwear from skid marks.

did you just make reference to a man-pon :doh:

[griff]

This will tell you all you need to know about bathroom behavior.

Enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzO1mCAVyMw

[crzyjournalist03]

I've had the dreaded red Charmin experience far too often. That stuff just tears right up.

For me, I've found that the perfect blend of strength yet comfort is Angel Soft. I always try to be the one who goes shopping when we're running low on TP, because my wife likes to get some of the softer stuff like the Red Charmin. I've tried delicately to explain my predicament to her, but she can't really understand because she's a woman.

[Blastoderm55]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
I've had the dreaded red Charmin experience far too often. That stuff just tears right up.

For me, I've found that the perfect blend of strength yet comfort is Angel Soft. I always try to be the one who goes shopping when we're running low on TP, because my wife likes to get some of the softer stuff like the Red Charmin. I've tried delicately to explain my predicament to her, but she can't really understand because she's a woman.

So you've had your finger to the brown too? :( I truly believe it is the culprit behind random brown spots on bathroom walls around the world. Its just instinct to try and get it off as quickly as possible.

[GrTigers6]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
I've had the dreaded red Charmin experience far too often. That stuff just tears right up.

For me, I've found that the perfect blend of strength yet comfort is Angel Soft. I always try to be the one who goes shopping when we're running low on TP, because my wife likes to get some of the softer stuff like the Red Charmin. I've tried delicately to explain my predicament to her, but she can't really understand because she's a woman. Maybe you ought to bend over and show it too her!!!:D

[Cam]

Originally posted by Blastoderm55
I've given up the fight against dingleberries. There is no winning. May as well just shower after pinching a loaf. What's bad is having to go right after showering. May as well just start your whole day over. :mad:

LOL!

[Cam]

Originally posted by PPHSfan
We have a bidet in the master bathroom. It's the greatest appliance in the house.

well excuse me Mr. Sophisticated!.....:D Maybe I'll just hook up my garden hose to my damn toilet and connect a high pressure sprayer to it!

[Cam]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
WOW!!:doh:

Football season REALLY needs to get here!!

no doubt RM....there's some real sick people here......

[Cam]

Originally posted by Sweetwater Red
Damn dude. What are you eating? Because I'm thinking you either need to change your diet
or start wiping your ass better after each visit to the restroom. I've never had DBs and the
red Charmin is a staple at my house.

It's OK Sweetwater, denial is a tough thing.....

[big daddy russ]

Originally posted by RoyceTTU
did you just make reference to a man-pon :doh:
After googling the word manpon, I suppose I did.

[44INAROW]

Originally posted by Blastoderm55
I don't mind the skid marks. I mind the sickening feeling that still have poo between my cheeks. :(

commonly known as SWAMP A$$ :D