A morbid question

[Ranger Mom]

I am getting mixed messages.

Does anyone know if it is legal to spread someones cremains (or ashes?)

As many of you know, my little sister died on October 29th, and according to her wishes, we had her cremated.

The funeral home said it was illegal to spread the ashes, but my dad, who used to work for them, said he doesn't think it is.

We aren't planning on doing this until next summer. She hated the cold and my conscience will not let me do it until the weather is warm.

I just don't wanna do it and then go to jail!! Has anyone had any experience with this?

[waterboy]

What they don't know won't hurt 'em is what I say. Where did you plan on spreading them?

[lostaussie]

I do think it is illegal................but we did it one time to a friend of mine at a local non to be named lake. What a barge party that was:D

[trojandad]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
I am getting mixed messages.

Does anyone know if it is legal to spread someones cremains (or ashes?)

As many of you know, my little sister died on October 29th, and according to her wishes, we had her cremated.

The funeral home said it was illegal to spread the ashes, but my dad, who used to work for them, said he doesn't think it is.

We aren't planning on doing this until next summer. She hated the cold and my conscience will not let me do it until the weather is warm.

I just don't wanna do it and then go to jail!! Has anyone had any experience with this?

here's the state code on it.....

http://law.onecle.com/texas/health/716.302.00.html

i've never preferred creamation but if i was going to have that done, i would want my ashes to be dispursed like mark harmon handled jodie foster's ashes in the movie "stealing home"....i won't spoil it for you if you havent seen it, but he works the whole movie to find how to best intern her and it works out very nicely.....so sorry again for your loss....

[crzyjournalist03]

uninhabited land or sea seems pretty broad to me...sounds like you'd probably be ok so long as you don't intentionally put them in someone's yard who didn't want them there.

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by waterboy
What they don't know won't hurt 'em is what I say. Where did you plan on spreading them?

It is at a lake she always liked. Probably wouldn't be off a boat though, just along the shoreline.

I picked out the music for her funeral, my dad sang "Never Been This Homesick Before" (don't know how he made it through it) and then we played a recording of "How Great Thou Art."

Here true love was classic rock though, so I wanna scatter her to Motley Crue's "Home Sweet Home."

I just don't want it to be TOO obvious what we are doing.

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by trojandad
here's the state code on it.....

http://law.onecle.com/texas/health/716.302.00.html

i've never preferred creamation but if i was going to have that done, i would want my ashes to be dispursed like mark harmon handled jodie foster's ashes in the movie "stealing home"....i won't spoil it for you if you havent seen it, but he works the whole movie to find how to best intern her and it works out very nicely.....so sorry again for your loss....

This is my first experience with a cremation. This was her wish though, and frankly, when I found out it was going to be $1,300.00 for the cremation vs. $6,000.00 for the "cheapest" casket we could get...it was a no brainer to me.

Me, my brother, mom and dad split the cost. Since my dad had worked at the funeral home in the past, they did the service there free of charge...which saved us $900.

[bobcat1]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
It is at a lake she always liked. Probably wouldn't be off a boat though, just along the shoreline.

I picked out the music for her funeral, my dad sang "Never Been This Homesick Before" (don't know how he made it through it) and then we played a recording of "How Great Thou Art."

Here true love was classic rock though, so I wanna scatter her to Motley Crue's "Home Sweet Home."

I just don't want it to be TOO obvious what we are doing. You are awesome RM.

[waterboy]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
This is my first experience with a cremation. This was her wish though, and frankly, when I found out it was going to be $1,300.00 for the cremation vs. $6,000.00 for the "cheapest" casket we could get...it was a no brainer to me.

Me, my brother, mom and dad split the cost. Since my dad had worked at the funeral home in the past, they did the service there free of charge...which saved us $900.
Wow! That was cheap! I buried my older brother in '01 for about $7,100, and my youngest brother for about $7,800 last year. Unfortunately, I didn't get much help with those bills, but it's all good.

As long as you spread the ashes in the lake discretely in a quiet area of the lake with no other people around I can't see the harm in doing it the way you want. I don't see you getting into any trouble unless there are other people around.

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by waterboy
Wow! That was cheap! I buried my older brother in '01 for about $7,100, and my youngest brother for about $7,800 last year. Unfortunately, I didn't get much help with those bills, but it's all good.

As long as you spread the ashes in the lake discretely in a quiet area of the lake with no other people around I can't see the harm in doing it the way you want. I don't see you getting into any trouble unless there are other people around.

That's kind of what I was worried about....I'm afraid Motley Crue blaring out of a stereo might cause some attention.

On the other hand, if I was at a lake and someone starting throwing somebody elses ashes around, it would probably freak me out a little!!

I guess I just really need to check out the lake a little beforehand and see if I can find a spot where the public doesn't gather and we won't be so obvious...but where she can still be in the sun!!:)

[Tejastrue]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
It is at a lake she always liked. Probably wouldn't be off a boat though, just along the shoreline.

I picked out the music for her funeral, my dad sang "Never Been This Homesick Before" (don't know how he made it through it) and then we played a recording of "How Great Thou Art."

Here true love was classic rock though, so I wanna scatter her to Motley Crue's "Home Sweet Home."

I just don't want it to be TOO obvious what we are doing.



Sorry for your loss. A nice breeze blowing across the water would be a good time. Creates the sense of being released and free. This should satisfy the guidelines against the accumulation in a confined area.

Myself, I would not care what anybody else thought...

[waterboy]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
That's kind of what I was worried about....I'm afraid Motley Crue blaring out of a stereo might cause some attention.

On the other hand, if I was at a lake and someone starting throwing somebody elses ashes around, it would probably freak me out a little!!

I guess I just really need to check out the lake a little beforehand and see if I can find a spot where the public doesn't gather and we won't be so obvious...but where she can still be in the sun!!:)
:D Haha..............yep, I thinking BLARING Motley Crue music would draw attention. :doh: I don't know which lake, or what the shoreline looks like, but I'd try to get somebody with a boat to take me out on the lake somewhere where theres nobody around. If that's out of the question, scouting is definitely your best option, and if it's a busy lake on weekends you might be better off picking a weekday, too.

[wimbo_pro]

Originally posted by waterboy
Wow! That was cheap! I buried my older brother in '01 for about $7,100, and my youngest brother for about $7,800 last year. Unfortunately, I didn't get much help with those bills, but it's all good.

As long as you spread the ashes in the lake discretely in a quiet area of the lake with no other people around I can't see the harm in doing it the way you want. I don't see you getting into any trouble unless there are other people around.

Thats horrible Waterboy!! Two brothers? I always thought you were very young. I hopeyou arenot...no young person should have that pain.

RM...again...so sorry for your loss. If I am not mistaken, I met her on here, right? As I remember, she would come into chat a lot. We laughed quite a bit.

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by wimbo_pro
Thats horrible Waterboy!! Two brothers? I always thought you were very young. I hopeyou arenot...no young person should have that pain.

RM...again...so sorry for your loss. If I am not mistaken, I met her on here, right? As I remember, she would come into chat a lot. We laughed quite a bit.

No...that is Sweetxpeach, she is my sister in law!!

As a matter of fact, she is married to my sister's twin brother!

[waterboy]

Originally posted by wimbo_pro
Thats horrible Waterboy!! Two brothers? I always thought you were very young. I hopeyou arenot...no young person should have that pain.

Not real young, but not too old, either.;) I'm ONLY 49-years old. Thanks for the kind words, though. Those were some tough times, so I can definitely relate.

[wimbo_pro]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
No...that is Sweetxpeach, she is my sister in law!!

As a matter of fact, she is married to my sister's twin brother!

Yes! Sweetpeach!. How is she? Still though...my heart goes out to you. I have 7 brothers and sisters, we are close and I dont even want to consider what you have gone through (Waterboy too). Hang in there!

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by wimbo_pro
Yes! Sweetpeach!. How is she? Still though...my heart goes out to you. I have 7 brothers and sisters, we are close and I dont even want to consider what you have gone through (Waterboy too). Hang in there!

She's doing good! You were her favorite in the chats!!!:D

My sister's death wasn't unexpected, she had a drinking problem for years and ended up with cirrhosis of the liver. We knew that was going to get her in the end, even thought she had FINALLY quit drinking.

She was living with me at the time and had been up and down, but this last episode happened so fast, if my husband hadn't called the paramedics when he did, she probably would have died there.

I know it sounds terrible to say, but I am SO GLAD she died at the hospital and not at my house!!!

[waterboy]

I don't blame you, RM. I'd feel the same way. I wouldn't want a loved one dying at my house, either.

[zeeman]

My husband scattered his oldest sons ashes in a park up on top of a hill that they used to run up and down.

We scattered a friends ashes on a ranch up in the Hill Country beside a creek and placed a small stone with her name on it.

[LionFan72]

PM me if a lake near me is involved, I could provide you privacy if you would like.

[LIONS#1]

Losing a loved one is the hardest thing we go through here in this world. Grief can consume you if you allow it. Sounds like you have a good support group around you. I have a loved one in a place that was special to her on South Padre Island where the view is awesome and the sand is clean. You can only get there by 4x4. Just do it and don't worry about anything else..It will also offer you some closure as well as knowing she is where she wanted to be. So sorry for your loss..