Humor on the football field

[Old Cardinal]

I want to start a discussion on funny things that have happened on the gridiron!....I was having breakfast with an Old Coach, fixing to retire, and he told this one that happened...."A Senior that usually rode the bench was called on to go into a ballgame. Well, lets just say he was not a candidate for Valdictorian. The kid was covering a fast End, and crowded way up toward the line of scrimmage. The Defensive Coached hollered 'Loosen Up!, Loosen Up!' And the boy, started doing SIDE-STRADDLE-HOPS."....Please share a funny one with us?

<small>[ July 16, 2003, 06:48 PM: Message edited by: Old Cardinal ]</small>

[Old Dog]

Our coach began switching from the single wing to the "T" formation in mid season because he finally found a good soph. QB to operate his new "T". Well, one friday night the center "thought" the play was with the QB under the center, when in fact there was nobody taking direct snaps, but he should have hiked the ball to the blocking back who was lined up 2 or so yards behind him. The ball shot straight up in the air 10-15 feet and by some miracle, a member of the backfield caught the ball and made a first down. Meanwhile our opponent was saying what the "H" was that.....it couldn't be legal?

In the same game the same center was going down on a punt. For some reason the ref threw his cap on the spot where the ball went out of bounds. The cap landed just inside the playing field and guess who promptly "recovered" the cap.....of course, our center!

[Brahma73]

Our Freshmen football team in Bellville (yes, that was a long time ago!) only had 12 players, and our coach was an ex-marine who chewed HUGE wads of Redman on the sideline. Everybody on the team except 2 linemen went both ways. Hell, we went ALL the way! We did not score a single touchdown all year.
We did have a chance to score once: Our best athlete was returning an opening kick-off and was actually breaking into the clear. Even our own players couldn't believe our eyes. At about mid-field, one of our linemen decided to get out front and "lead the way" to the zone. He stumbled at the opponents 40 and subsequently tackled our stud, thwarting our only real scoring opportunity of the year. It took the players and coaches 15 minutes to break up the fist fight that ensued between those two players. Nobody kept a straight face the rest of the night! It was a riot!!

[Old Cardinal]

Boy those are both great stories!...When I was a youth, we had a player that was in the process of running down a ballcarrier. He happened to look down and his pants were coming down! Yes, he gave up the chase and pulled his pants up.... At the review of the film(old bad black & white film, those days)...The Coach kept chewing his butt out, for stopping and pulling his pants up-it was hard to not laugh at that film viewing episode.

[true_blue_tiger]

One time, our 2nd string center broke the huddle, and ran up to the ball. The coaches were yelling at him to get back in the huddle, as to run time off the clock, but he had already touched the ball when he finally understod what the coaches wanted. So, he takes off back to the huddle, when the other team picks of the ball and takes off running towards the endzone! Luckily one of our running backs caught up with the guy before he scored! and we all had a big laugh about it afterwards.

[sinton66]

I remember once we had to practice in the gym because the field was all wet. We were all in shorts and T-shirts. Coach called a running play and our right side TE jumped the snap count and went scurrying down the court saying "Boogedy, Boogedy, Boogedy". Everybody else was quiet, so it kinda stood out like a sore thumb. We all got a good laugh about that.

[BURNT ORANGE HORNET 86]

In 7th grade our running back broke one down the sideline for aprx 40yrds or so when his pants started to fall down. He didn't have on shorts just his jock with one hand on his paints & other on the ball he fell down at the 5. :D eek!

<small>[ July 16, 2003, 10:52 PM: Message edited by: BURNT ORANGE HORNET 86 ]</small>

[PhiI C]

When I was a freshman on the B Team we had the honor of once in a while scrimaging the Varsity. They had a big all district center (and actually we are very good friends today). The ball was lined up at the five yard line and the varsity had the ball. The B Team coach put me over this big all district player (I weighed about 120 lbs if that much) and the play was to go right over me. I was determined to make good on the play (which explains why I became a track man) and charged right into the center. Needless to say it upset him (I think he was actually going to take it easy on me) and then he charged back and the next think I knew I was lying flat on my back with my head about two feet from the goal line and the runner was crossing the goal line to my left.

[PhiI C]

I love football and all sports but the last reply tells about my brief stab at a moment of football glory and best explains why I became a track man.

[BH_146]

Okay, I've got a couple. The first is on myself. This occurred during a playoff game in late November. A front had blown in during the pre-game activities and it was not only cold but this front had lots of rain. (I swear that the water on the bleachers was freezing as the night wore on. What misery!) We are losing late in the game. One of our secondary backs gets his feet knocked out from under him, hurting one ankle while losing his shoe. The refs stop the game and I jog out. I check the kid and he is okay because it's just another "because it is so cold" it hurts injuries. I grab the player's shoe and we start leaving the field. Suddenly, the kid decides he is okay so he starts running to the huddle (with only one shoe on). I race behind him, grab him and head him back to the sidelines. He again tries to go back to the huddle and jerks away from me. I quickly grab him and try to pull him back toward the sideline. My wife said people started to laugh at the sight of this tug-of-war. At one point, I finally grabbed him and pulled him close. It was at that time, I noticed he had a mouth full of skoal which was too close to my face. I'm not sure what prompted my next reaction; being tired of the tug-of-war or the fact the fact that the kid had time to take a dip during the game. But I used his number 10 that was in my hand to give him 3 quick raps on the top of his helmet. My wife said the stands came unglued. As I look back, I am happy they viewed it as a light moment in a night of misery or I guess I would have been meeting with the sup. I can only imagine what would happen to me in today's society.

The other humorous story had to do with a freshmen player. The player was kinda skinny, kinda slow afoot and not very tall. Yet, his dad saw him as the quarterback. So, that is the position the kid was trying to play. His dad was one that would attend one or two practices during the week as well as the Thursday night game. But he never really saw why the son was not starting. Early in the season, the dad did not attend a game (he always let his presence be known). During the J.V. game, the freshmen coach and I asked the kid about his dad not being at the game. The boy stated that his dad was clearing up a problem that had occurred over the weekend. Being more curious than concerned, we inquired about the problem. The kid said that on Sunday, a crop duster keep flying over their house messing up the tv reception. The dad was an avid Dallas Cowboy fan and finally tired of the interruptions. The man promptly went outside and shot down the crop duster so he could finish watching the Cowboys. The next week, the player didn't start but did see his first game time of the year.

[bulldog65]

OK, here goes. My Senior year in high school we were playing against the Meade Buffaloes. The game is kind of tight, and their big running back was having a good game against us. Coach Furman( a real fireball), calls timeout and proceeds to jump on us pretty bad. He especially was hard on my second cousin and myself. Now my second cousin was a big ol farmboy named Calvin Maddodus Uhl, "Mode" to his friends. At 6'4", 240 he played right Defensive End. We were in a 4-5 and I was outside linebacker off his hip. Mode was the most gentle person you ever knew, but if he got mad it was like incredible Hulk rage. During the timeout Coach Furman grabbed his facemask and is yanking it back & forth, up and down and really yelling in his face. Anyway when play resumed and we took our positions, usually Mode got in a four pt stance, but this time he was standing, he was so big I couldn't see my key, so I am yelling at him to get down. He starts swinging his massive forearms back and forth, back and forth. When the ball is hiked, he slams both arms either side of the opposing tight end's head straight up! The poor guy just wilted and his helmet was ripped off and sent flying about 10 ft in the air. Thank God the play went the other way because I was rolling on the field laughing. Unfortunately for me, it was all caught on tape. :rolleyes:

<small>[ July 17, 2003, 05:52 AM: Message edited by: bulldog65 ]</small>

[St. Ivender]

We were playing the San Augustine Wolves who had a player named "Bucky" who was the object of many of our players' aggression. It seems several of our players had words with Bucky during the previous track season. We were a primarily left handed running team and Bucky was their left defensive end. Bucky popped off that we were afraid to run to "his side" our right. I was the right tackle and I never would have dreamed of asking the coach to run a particular play but as luck would have it he called "Scat Right". The Right Guard and I pulled on the play and it was my responsibility to block the corner while he took out the end. The guard was a tough feisty daredevil of a kid with no fear whatsoever. I think we gained 20 plus yards and after the play Bucky was helped off the field. Our guard was congratulated for taking out this smart aleck. When we gathered to review the film it became apparent why Bucky left the game. On the play our guard rather than making a traditional block ran out at full speed lept into the air and planted his right foot square into Bucky's chest a la Jackie Chan. The team was whooping it up but the coach was none too pleased and made the guard run extra laps that day. I know I caught a smile on the coach's face though.

[exbccards76'smom]

This is one of the funnies that I have. When my son was in the seventh grade, they were playing a another junior high team from Port Arthur. Bridge city won the toss and chose to receive. The Port Arthur team lined up to kick the ball. Their kicker gave the signal to start. He ran up to kick the ball off the tee, and missed the whole think completely!! It looked like something off American's funniest Home Videos. :D

[Cameronbystander]

OLD CARDINAL: A friend of mine who is a high school and SEC football official has a saying about plays like you describe at the beginning of this thread.

"That was like drinking out of a clean SLOP jar. It's OK but it just don't look right."

[Old Cardinal]

I just remembered one!.... Once we were on the field prior to the game warming up when we noticed that "Bubba" was not with us. He was a good player. They sent the trainer back to the field house-but no Bubba. Just as it was kickoff time, here comes Bubba as fast as he could run! Here is the story that he told the Coach...It seemed that the commodes were occupied in the field house, so Bubba went over to use the one in the girls side of the locker room building. He is sitting in a stall when several Ladies came in. To keep from being detected-he had to sit quitely with his feet up in the air, to keep someone from spying his football, size 12 shoes! Thank goodness that the Ladies left, and no one came in--- and Bubba made the Kickoff.

<small>[ July 17, 2003, 04:06 PM: Message edited by: Old Cardinal ]</small>

[true_blue_tiger]

that sounds like something that would happen to us! usually on away games