If picking a wife was like the NFL Draft...

[TheDOCTORdre]

what would the combine events be?

[Keith7]

I was here in case this thread gets closed

[nationalpastime]

you would have to include an inspection of the mother.

rate their moodiness when it's that time.

put a mop out in a kitchen with soapy water to see if they mop the dirty floor willingly or if they have to be told.

that's just a few.

[Bullaholic]

Good thing you were the first on this thread, Dre. I cannot even begin to imagine the posts on this one....the creativity in maintaining decorum and staying within board rules will be very interesting to see, to say the least. :D

[turbostud]

Think of it this way. Set up a washer and a dryer station, and ironing board station, a sweep and swab station, a cooking station, and see who performs the best.

[STANG RED]

Originally posted by turbostud
Think of it this way. Set up a washer and a dryer station, and ironing board station, a sweep and swab station, a cooking station, and see who performs the best.

:confused: Where is the sex station???

[TheDOCTORdre]

Originally posted by STANG RED
:confused: Where is the sex station???

Do you really wanna scout your next wife whoring around at a combine event?

[STANG RED]

Originally posted by TheDOCTORdre
Do you really wanna scout your next wife whoring around at a combine event?

Doesnt really matter to me. There wont be a next one. Read into that what you will. :D

[Matthew328]

Maybe....well never mind I'll leave it alone.

[BaseballUmp]

Originally posted by STANG RED
Doesnt really matter to me. There wont be a next one. Read into that what you will. :D

Haha nobody wants to be the one to draft the first round bust...

[turbostud]

Originally posted by STANG RED
:confused: Where is the sex station???

Thats at the strip club, after we evaluate the "Cooking and Cleaning Combine"

[coach]

What drill could we run to see how much bit**in they do for no reason

[coach]

Originally posted by TheDOCTORdre
what would the combine events be?

dre ill trade you my 3rd and 5th round picks for your 2nd round pick and a woman to be named later

[garciap77]

Originally posted by TheDOCTORdre
Do you really wanna scout your next wife whoring around at a combine event?

:eek: :eek: :eek:

[Farmersfan]

In this case, being the fastest would not be a upgrade! Best case scenerio is to find one that can play multiply positions but excels at the end around!!!!

[crzyjournalist03]

I hope there's a Wonder-lick test!!!!

[turbostud]

Originally posted by coach
dre ill trade you my 3rd and 5th round picks for your 2nd round pick and a woman to be named later

I got a 300 pounder I am looking to deal, but she aint going cheap. It'll cost at least a first round pick. :eek:

[turbostud]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
I hope there's a Wonder-lick test!!!!

Oh I am real good at those. :D

[BwdLion73]

Originally posted by STANG RED
:confused: Where is the sex station???

...here we go...:wave:

[turbostud]

there would have to be a Sandwich Dash. Who can make me a sammich in 4.3 seconds?

[ASUFrisbeeStud]

Popsicle eating contest

[BaseballUmp]

In case this gets closed while im in class :wave:

[BEAST]

Bobbing for apples would be a good event.




BEAST

[Farmersfan]

Priorities for a quality draft:


Can take a stiff arm!

Ain't afraid of a ball to the face!

Can stay bent over for the entire count!

Doesn't mind going into the dirt for a low one!

Can go one-on-one with anyone, anytime!

Doesn't might practice but prefers the game!

Keeps away from the unnecessary roughness penalties!

And finally,

Knows that when the final horn blows, the dang game is OVER!
:D

[LE Dad]

Oh I coul get this thread closed and a lifetime ban with what I have to say on this subject.

I would just assume mangle my fingers individually with a sledge hammer than have to deal with another wife.:doh:

You could just sign em to a one year deal and if they are worth anything you can give em an extension, but to hell with a signing bonus and if she starts b*#chn, then it is time to cut her.:p

[Farmersfan]

Originally posted by LE Dad
Oh I coul get this thread closed and a lifetime ban with what I have to say on this subject.

I would just assume mangle my fingers individually with a sledge hammer than have to deal with another wife.:doh:

You could just sign em to a one year deal and if they are worth anything you can give em an extension, but to hell with a signing bonus and if she starts b*#chn, then it is time to cut her.:p




No guaranteed contracts huh? Sounds like you would opt for a incentive ladin contract. Would you agree to a No-Trade clause? :D

[Ranger Mom]

This thread scares me!!:doh:

[TheDOCTORdre]

Originally posted by Ranger Mom
This thread scares me!!:doh:

how fastcan you make a sandwich

[crzyjournalist03]

I think an obvious fact that most people are overlooking is the fact that just like the real combine, the physical measurements can go a long way in determining a prospect's value.

[Farmersfan]

Must be able to play at a high level even with an injury!

[LE Dad]

Originally posted by Farmersfan
No guaranteed contracts huh? Sounds like you would opt for a incentive ladin contract. Would you agree to a No-Trade clause? :D Exactly, you better produce on the field. I believe that every year she should play like it's her contract year, and there better not be any work stoppages.:devil:

[Farmersfan]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
I think an obvious fact that most people are overlooking is the fact that just like the real combine, the physical measurements can go a long way in determining a prospect's value.



Well it can get them an invite but it's performance that allows them to stay!!!!

[crzyjournalist03]

Originally posted by Farmersfan
Well it can get them an invite but it's performance that allows them to stay!!!!


Agreed. There will be plenty of people and prospects who want to talk about things like "intangibles", but for me, it would have to be all tangible..."What have you done for me lately?"

[SintonFan]

Originally posted by Farmersfan
Must be able to play at a high level even with an injury!

I vote headaches to be considered an injury.:nerd:

[garciap77]

Originally posted by LE Dad
Oh I coul get this thread closed and a lifetime ban with what I have to say on this subject.

I would just assume mangle my fingers individually with a sledge hammer than have to deal with another wife.:doh:

You could just sign em to a one year deal and if they are worth anything you can give em an extension, but to hell with a signing bonus and if she starts b*#chn, then it is time to cut her.:p


:D

[bobcat4life]

I was here in case this geets closed:D


and a dirty kitchen that needs to be cleaned would be nice

[garciap77]

Originally posted by crzyjournalist03
I think an obvious fact that most people are overlooking is the fact that just like the real combine, the physical measurements can go a long way in determining a prospect's value.

:thinking:


http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd185/garciap77/horizon_football_girls.jpg


:D

[TheDOCTORdre]

can i see how they perform with other draftees in case I decide to do a "running back by committee" type thing

[BwdLion73]

6 hours later I make it home and this thread is still open?:clap:

[carter08]

Hopefully I get some good late rounders that are willing to work with my early round picks.

[LE Dad]

I start out with undrafted free agents but somehow they always end up asking for 1st round money.:mad:

[Farmersfan]

Originally posted by LE Dad
I start out with undrafted free agents but somehow they always end up asking for 1st round money.:mad:



Greatness Dad!!!!
Don't you just hate it when the bench warmers ask for starter money???? Thank God there's no salary cap or I would be forced for forfeit the rest of the season!!!!!

[pancho villa]

I know what i would like to say but I just got off a 4 game supension.

[garciap77]

Originally posted by pancho villa
I know what i would like to say but I just got off a 4 game supension.

:clap: :clap: :clap:

[charlesrixey]

Originally posted by TheDOCTORdre
Do you really wanna scout your next wife whoring around at a combine event?

only events that matter after marriage are included

[Ranger Mom]

Originally posted by pancho villa
I know what i would like to say but I just got off a 4 game supension.

Troublemaker!!!:p :p

[TheDOCTORdre]

Day 2 of the wife draft and still not closed:D

[garciap77]

Originally posted by TheDOCTORdre
Day 2 of the wife draft and still not closed:D

2 A Days of the wife???????????:D



;)

[maroogreen]

If picking a wife was like the NFL Draft...


it would be about ability and not appearance, women would get $50 million contracts without penalty for average performance, monetary bonuses for outstanding performances, free agent clauses, a right to renogotiate the contract after a few years, 4 months off every year, and mandatory retirement after 5 (or is it 7) years under contract to ANY husband.

[millcreek]

Originally posted by maroogreen
If picking a wife was like the NFL Draft...


it would be about ability and not appearance, women would get $50 million contracts without penalty for average performance, monetary bonuses for outstanding performances, free agent clauses, a right to renogotiate the contract after a few years, and mandatory retirement after 5 (or is it 7) years under contract to ANY husband.

I like your way of thinking, the only thing needed is the "68" clause... "you do me and I'll owe you one"..the first time the husband violated that clause, the wife should be released from her contract and the husband should be forced to payout the remaing contract. PLUS all monthly expenses until she remarries.

Gentleman, I'll wait patiently for your replies....

[LE Dad]

Originally posted by millcreek
I like your way of thinking, the only thing needed is the "68" clause... "you do me and I'll owe you one"..the first time the husband violated that clause, the wife should be released from her contract and the husband should be forced to payout the remaing contract. PLUS all monthly expenses until she remarries.

Gentleman, I'll wait patiently for your replies.... LOL,
OOOOOOKAY!!! we're guys... We don't get all that carried away.:D


















Just as long as our supper is cooked and our laundry is done.

















:D :D

[garciap77]

Originally posted by LE Dad
LOL,
OOOOOOKAY!!! we're guys... We don't get all that carried away.:D


















Just as long as our supper is cooked and our laundry is done.

















:D :D


OK LENOVA!

:D :D :D :D

[millcreek]

I can tell right now you're a contract breaker...
If the contract demands I wash your clothes and cook your dinner, then you're gonna learn how to count. (you kno what I mean)

and we (girls) take that very serious..

[TheDOCTORdre]

would there be a grading criteria on how quiet they were while doing there work

[LE Dad]

Originally posted by millcreek
I can tell right now you're a contract breaker...
If the contract demands I wash your clothes and cook your dinner, then you're gonna learn how to count. (you kno what I mean)

and we (girls) take that very serious.. LOL, I deal in contracts, I have no need to break it. You would be surprised at my counting ability also.:eek: :p :D

[LE Dad]

Originally posted by TheDOCTORdre
would there be a grading criteria on how quiet they were while doing there work Yes, I would equate that to a receivers vertical. :D